i hate how EVERYTHING i learnt about the lgbtq community was through twitter and youtube but y'all still go after every single detail of what someone said

tw// lgbtqphobia
like; i grow up and the only lgbtq-related stuff I would see was gay man being treated as a joke on tv. my family has always refered to lesbians and trans people as "oh poor person from a reality far away from me who i will feel sorry as if it was something bad

and treat it as a taboo at the same time". the other letters? i didn't even knew they existed. so yeah i am very thankful 4/5 years ago i started to join fandoms and would see people talking about it. because even though i could see that folks around me weren't examples i wanted

to follow, i would not really comprehend why. i came out as pan last year (only here, and to 3 irl friends) and oh boi how much i still struggle to understand myself and the community. i have had major problems with friends when i tried to speak up for the pan community and i can

only imagine what would happen if i told them i was a part of it. dude i don't even know if this term is right for me because i have so many few people talking about it and gets hard to compare my story and experiences with others. the only time i remember lgbtq stuff during my

scholar years was when a writting(?) teacher asked us to make a presention on a topic and this group (whose leader has already said some homophobic things that still make noise in my brain up till this day) decided to talk about the community. and ngl, i have NO IDEA of what they

said because i was scared of paying attention skksk (sorry to the group, i love them anyways). so thank you to all of you guys who took some time to help a complete stranger on the internet understand this topic, but god please see how much we still have to face. so going back-

please do not:
1- attack/cancel someone if they said something wrong (if they are doing it on purpose, okay, go for it, block them. they suck) but i see so many people around me who are just- uneducated you know. half of my family and people I know irl would be cancelled within 2

hours on stan twitter but i still try to talk to them and i am seeing some results. (this is not excusing anything or anyone, just please don't share more hate)
2- pretent all representation must be perfect all the times. let's keep criticizing what we fell it's wrong and keep

applauding what helped us. like c'mon i am pan, and i can not name a single pan rep that doesn't come with a "but" afterwards. but i am still thankful someone in a backstage of a european show put emojis hearts on a instagram description - even if they don't say it on camera. and

i am still thankful someone said deadpool was pansexual - even if 99% of the world will never know. or when we got a freaking pan love interest on a romcom movie - who happened to say some biphobic stuff which i will not excuse. but youknow- feels so good to be seen. i can

address all of those problems but it still warms my heart knowing there is someone out there trying to make progress on this. sometimes i feel like we are stuck on our bubbles hoping that we finally get an amazing representation while there is still so much in our way. yay let's

celebrate this lgbtq piece of media WHILE pointing out what is hurtful and could be done better

anywhoo
the point of this thread is: none,
i just wanted to rant.
i don't think anyone read that far but if you did please don't cancel me

oh and i hate youtube and tumblr. can we please get our informations somewhere else? youtube videos comparing bi x pan are my worst enemies