i once was in a relation where if they were happy, everything felt good & i was happy. when they were upset, i was but also anxiously worried that i did something wrong. the moment you realize that you’re in this position, take 20 steps back. it’s not supposed to be like that b.

for me, it had nothing to do with them and everything to do with my own codependency and thinking i needed to fix them; thinking everything revolved around me when it REALLY didnt then i’d self sabotage lmaoo it was terrible.

+ i always expected them to reassure me but reassurance and making them soothe my anxiety/fear of abandonment was extremely, actually highly enabling for me. my codependency wasn’t their issue but i projected as if it were. external reassurance is like a drug. it’s never enough