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@dantydewolfy You asked me multiple times to post publicly how I feel about you. You also wanted me to explain my disappearance to my friends. So here is what you wanted: I hate you and I left because of a fight with you. There are a few reasons why. You say that my behavior with https://twitter.com/dantydewolfy/status/1254771564039430147">https://twitter.com/dantydewo...
you at first was all a lie. You don’t understand that I was excited for your attention, and I genuinely felt on a level the way I felt toward you. You don’t understand that people can change a lot in response to negative experiences. You say my gifts for you were also lies while
calling them genuinely kind. In one of our last fights, you said that you did so much to help me and I did nothing in return. But in the past you’ve admitted these: just being your friend was helping you, many of your friends now are because you met me, I took interest in your
hobbies, without me you would be “back at step one” without anyone who took as much interest in you as me. You tried to lose weight dangerously and I tried to tell you to stop. I’ve tried to ask about your issues in the past and you refuse to tell me. You asked how I ever helped.
In the moment I only remembered one, and I think it& #39;s the most important. I first said my plans to leave months ago and you were so distraught you had a suicidal breakdown. I called you and went back on my word, promising to stay for you. You thanked me. You dismiss it as just
one thing but if it weren’t for this one thing you might have died that night. But to you it’s worthless. You showed suicidal thoughts a second time. When I wanted to contact your parents you lashed out, saying you would hate me if I did. A third time you said you show many signs
I tried to tell you to get help and you said you’re past it now. Even now you still think you are not liked much and that your life overall is awful, so are you really past it? You are so closed that I have few chances to help and you push away regardless, so it’s easy to say I
never helped. But you can’t say I didn’t try or I never cared. When I was first cutting myself I wanted to stop, so I asked you for help. You pressured me to make written and recorded promises, refusing to leave me alone until I gave in. You scolded me for relapsing. One time you
said “I knew you couldn’t do it” when I refused. You say it was all of my own free will. I still wanted to please you while desperate to stop so you insisting caused me to feel more pressure and shame than before. I told you I learned in therapy that your method was wrong and
you still didn’t apologize. You also pressured me this way to give you my mother’s phone number in case of emergency, and I ended up choosing to give you both hers and my father’s. I left two weeks ago in anger telling you I would kill myself that night in spite. You contacted my
parents. Why is it acceptable for you to do it but unacceptable for me? After I told you I talked to them and felt better, you called me a liar for not being fully open and threatened to contact them on a different number the next week. Being open like that is hard for me and you
forced it. I repeatedly started fights with you. You started to insult me back, calling me stupid in different ways and keeping a calm, smug attitude. You were like this in our last arguments despite saying you feel terrible. I trusted you with knowing my issues with my family
and you mocked me for it with the “big happy family” comment. You say you’re willing to admit when you’re wrong but you said everything I hold against you was because I did the same to you, my own choice, or inaccurate assumptions. You played along in my fights, and chose to hurt
me just like how I chose to hurt you. I know that I have mistakes and issues but I won’t apologize if you don’t admit your own. You say you always care about me and still do, but hurt me in your own ways. You tried to call me out multiple times to make me explain my feelings
about you and leaving. You did it privately, in the tweet at the top, and tagged me in a group chat with our friends. I didn’t want to bother them with an excessive personal information and felt they would easily move on anyway. I didn’t want to because I felt people would hate
me. You took this as admitting guilt, saying you would drink to celebrate. You said everyone would hate you at first to encourage me to post it. I still feel a desire to abandon Strix because I feel like there’s no point in being here now. Seeing someone I hate be part of a group
I felt attached to, and try to force me to show my darkest thoughts to everyone only makes me feel more uncomfortable and unwanted. But you held it against me for not explaining. So there it is, just like you asked.
