Recently I wrote something about the necessity of pointing grieving friends to Christ. Responses from many Christian women were very eager - “No no no!! That’s all wrong! We are supposed to weep with the weeping! They need our shoulder to cry on!” ....

Where do Christian women get the “right answer” for something like this? Some knowledge that makes them object to pointing to Christ? I assume that a bunch of them learned this in a book study hosted by their women’s ministry. They are eager to do it right!

I hate this in SO MANY WAYS. There appears to be a lot of Christian women who have been taught by other Christians that their own shoulder is a better comfort than Christ. This is discipleship toward the goal of emotional protection. Theology built from hurt feelings

But underneath it is this assumption: Christianity is basically a bunch of equations that offer no true comfort to humans. To apply them (or quote Rom. 8:28 ) in a major trial is peak heartlessness.
Why? Because someone got their feelings hurt when that was done to them.

I want to know if there is any Christian who can speak of Christ in a time of great sorrow and NOT be weeping with those who weep?! To speak of our dearest (our only!) hope in a time of trial is not heartless, it is our whole heart! It is our whole life!

To carry this on: many women’s ministries focus only on books that help us tread carefully around one another’s emotions - and think that telling the ladies READ YOUR BIBLE is a little heartless and probably guilt mongering. You know what is a guilty life? Serving emotions.

Many Christian women are in total bondage to guilt- did I hurt her feelings? Am I loving enough? Did I say it perfectly? Telling her not to sleep with her boyfriend would be judgy...
But reading the Word is not going to enhance that guilt, it will destroy it.

Full circle: and that’s why many women’s ministry leaders are in open opposition to challenging their women to read the Bible. It would break the unhealthy ties that bind them- it would get them out from being snuggled and bottle fed by women who should know better.

If it so happens that the women in your church are mostly falling into the “heartless truth pellet approach”- the answer is STILL more Word of God, not less.