I'm trying hard (too hard?) to understand.

The dad worked in tech, and now is "between jobs." Maybe there is burnout / depression involved? Hard to contribute. Now feels he's ruined his wife's work, failed his family, publicly dragged?

If so, therapy! https://www.thelily.com/i-had-to-choose-being-a-mother-with-no-child-care-or-summer-camps-women-are-being-edged-out-of-the-workforce/

Doing full-time childcare is exhausting for highly capable, great parents. But 3 days and quiting is so unbelievably low, that it seems like something else is going on.

Maybe he really is just a lazy dude. Or maybe his tank was already empty.

Anyone can get burned out. But lots of dudes are reluctant to get professional help. File next to "I don't wear a mask because it makes me look weak."

If you don't take care of yourself, then you can't take care of your family. Childcare is taking care of your family.

Anyway, dudes that are like, "That guy is terrible! I'm not like that, so I'm one of the good ones!" Two things:

1. "Better than him" is not the bar

2. Our brains are lying to us. Unless we make a duty roster, we are not doing as much childcare as we think we are. Sorry.

Primary care givers of any gender, are more accurate when they estimate the secondary care giver's percentage contribution. Secondary usually greatly overestimates.

Even knowing this fact, I overestimate this too! Consistently! To this day!

Don't trust your brain. Roster.

So if as a guy, your read of the article is "That dude sucks!" you might not be taking full value from it.

I'm using it as an opportunity to update our duty roster, and get a pro take on my burnout level: 1 to 10. I feel fine, but then... I'm a dude, so I would think that.