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3 yrs ago today I attended my first Scottish reenactment event held at the Backus Page House. My friend had invited me earlier in the year, and as I was embarking on my self-improvement goals, it was the first big thing I said "yes" to.
3 yrs later my life is completely changed
3 yrs later my life is completely changed
During the winter of '16/'17 I was having a hard time. I was literally working all day in a basement, had a terrible self image, awful sleep. I was making decent art but I hated myself. This is where I was when I made this doodle I spread around every so often;
It was also around Jan of '17 that the "365 day challenge" was going on. I thought churning out these pieces every day would... no. honestly, I just wanted the kick of getting attention online. The pressure of creating these "quick" things destroyed my productivity for a month.
Early Feb I hit rock bottom for me. These quick fixes weren't the answer and I was wallowing in my own self hate. I finally decided to actually help myself and focus on my non-art goals. Exercise, looking for a vehicle, getting out of that place, saying yes.
Enter my friend
Enter my friend
It was scary. I was afraid of travel because... I didn't want people to know me. I was afraid of having to explain my living situation, or "confess" to not having done much other stuff before. I had a chronic fear of embarrassment that kept me from actually trying new things.
but I figured... if I didn't try this new thing after promising myself that I'd start saying yes more often, then what's the point.
So I said yes, went to a fabric store, got a 12ft length of plaid and started practicing belting it. With help :)
So I said yes, went to a fabric store, got a 12ft length of plaid and started practicing belting it. With help :)
I don't know if I did it for the views, for accountability, to show off, whatever, but I went out for a walk one day and had some pics taken of me in my kit.
This was a good idea, since a lady I was talking to at the time said I looked pretty good in this, so....
This was a good idea, since a lady I was talking to at the time said I looked pretty good in this, so....
Said if I was ever in her nick of the woods I'd ask her out. and so we decided to meet.
Problem was, her nick of the woods was.... over 6k kilometres away, in germany.
But, what with the whole "saying yes" thing....
Problem was, her nick of the woods was.... over 6k kilometres away, in germany.
But, what with the whole "saying yes" thing....
Since then I've moved, visited Germany, England, France. Drove to Pittsburgh on my own after conquering driving anxiety. Got invited to do an art lecture in London... I did a lot of neat things in those 3 years, a lot more in the fifteen years prior.
Just by saying yes :)
Just by saying yes :)
As devastated as I still am over the loss of my mom, I'm happy at least she was able to see those 3 years. To see me go from a literal basement dweller not sure of how to walk to the bank without shame, to where I am now. she knew her boy was alright.
