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Anyone else get really creeped out by certain groups in the community? Like, some of you guys are great, I've met a lot of great people like @vladfad581 from this community, but... You know... I've only ever had to block a few people. Even though I get tons of people...
Who purposely try and troll me or annoy me, I just ignore them. I only have ever blocked a few people. One was that someone kept asking me questions about me in a fetish context despite me saying multiple times it made me uncomfortable (Though in fairness I should've been more...
upfront with how it made me feel from the start), and one was cause the person was someone who not only condoned, but boasted about enjoying child porn and rape porn. Now, I know I've been making a lot of these longer posts recently, and don't worry, new stuff will be coming soon
But I feel like this needs to be addressed, and publicly. Hopefully in a good way because I'm very hungry and am waiting to eat for later, but I'll try to express myself as best as possible on the subject. I'll also try not to make this into an 'Everyone needs to be like me' post
Now, okay. I know this is a community literally built around one thing. A fetish. But that doesn't excuse anything more than a bit of fetish based chit-chat. Just because someone's into the same things as you, doesn't mean that you have free reign to bombard them with...
Your fetish experiences irl, or what you'd LIKE your fetish experience irl to be, or what the person you're talking to's irl experiences are, etc. etc. I can say for myself at least that I really don't like opening a message to see something like 'I love eating shit'
This thread is not speculation, what I'm talking about are things and issues that apply to me and people close to me based on things that have legitimately happened. I write stories, yet have people ask me fetishwise about me as a person.
I know people who do modelling but can't wholly enjoy being in the community because they receive people who break the line of 'casual compliments' to 'Psycho in a horror movie who has an obsession with a girl' level. Full-on 'I love you so much please hold me down and...
fart on my face every night and let me kiss you all over and marry me' level. I find the marry me comments a bit unnerving, I know it's INTENDED as a statement to be like 'You're so great and are doing everything right', but it comes off as 'OH MY GOD YOURE SO FUCKING HOT 
'
'
to me. But, bringing things up to people who aren't self-aware comes with some issues. The main things I've noticed historically in my two years in the community can be boiled down to one line when you confront someone on acting inappropriately. That is 'No, I wasn't.'
Now, what I mean is not that people try and defend themselves, you have a right to respectfully address your own opinion. But where the problem comes in is saying that it's impossible for someone to feel one way because you feel another way.
A while back a friend of mine was being bullied on a server and targeted by the head admin who picked on all their insecurities that the admin could find. When confronted on this, the admin simply said 'I was just joking, it's not picking on him'.
They then claimed they should be able to and are going to continue acting as such despite being informed of how it was affecting the individual because 'It's just a joke, stop bothering me'. I see this mentality popping up everywhere.
A person says they're creeped out by another person? The person responds with 'I'm not being creepy'. Someone is being a jerk to another person? That person responds with 'I'm not being a jerk'. When I had my last temporary server, there was a person on there
who asked in the art room if people would like to see more of their art. They were met with an immediate response by another person (I'll call person X) who said something to the effect of 'No, I don't think people want to see any more of your art.'
Now the artists took this harshly, and I as the admin calmly asked X to please be more respectful. X responded by saying everyone was being an asshole to them, and they were the victim, and they did nothing wrong. I warned X again, asking them to please be more respectful
and X responded by saying something like 'Fine, fine it's done.' and as everyone is going back to normal, X suddenly types 'Now that we're done, can everyone pull the sticks out of their asses?' trying to initiate more and more, and later claimed that it was me who was initiating
I would chock this up to trolling, but I know so many people who are legitimately this way, and never falter. I know video creators on twitter who both lie about who they are and fake their content. I know people who act super-nice to others until their target gives them money,
Only to just ignore their target now that they've gotten money from them. I know people who aggressively boast their work is superior to other peoples work, while being OBJECTIVELY lower quality, with more errors than actual sensical literature.
I know people who prey on younger people in the community, and try to manipulate them. I know people who bully others to the point of self-harm. I know tons and tons of people who are unwilling or even unable to step back and ask what they may be doing wrong.
I'm in no way saying I'm perfect. I'm fairly cold to the people I don't know well, I'm subject to overreactions to things, I get sad easily, I'm bad socially, I don't see my stories as the highest of quality, I've mistreated people before, but the way I see it, I can admit it.
And even more importantly, I don't try and just shrug it off, I try and improve. Whenever I see I'm doing something blatantly wrong, I try and improve myself so I don't do it again. I try and make sure I'm the best me I can be, even if the best me isn't perfect.
But it's so heartbreaking and so maddening seeing people not just go so tunnel-visioned that they are unaware of how horrible they are being as a human being and sometimes a creator, but disregard any other statements or opinions they don't see as true as objectively false.
I urge all of you, and I will myself after I post this, to take a minute, step back from your keyboard, and think, 'How do I treat people? How do I treat my friends? How do I treat my enemies? What kind of person am I and what kind do I want to be? And how will I get there?'
Please, please, for everyone's sake, take other people into consideration before giving in to your own ego, or libido, please. Thank you
