Hi, new #Skullgirls players! Glad you could join us!

After playing some times online, you might be thinking "man, Big Band/Beowulf is scummy".

I'm here to tell you: every character in this goddamn game is scummy. A fucking thread.

Filia is an asshole. She will literally get in your face and stay there and most times if they're smart, there's jack shit you can do.

Cerebella will literally grab you from every possible situation, then punish you because you decided to block something. 1/10

Parasoul? She was designed to be ranged and sucks at it. Instead, she'll spend her entire time mixing you up from up close.

Valentine? She was designed to play up close, but good luck catching her! Her body bag is a wall, and she can mix you up, and her throw is dumb. 2/10

Painwheel? Hahahahaha get hit, get reset, get overheaded and when you think you have a good punish, get armored. Get rekt. Get gud.

Peacock? Here's a character that doesn't even have to hit you to kill you. Too much chip, too much meter and her rushdown is stupid. 3/10

Ms. Fortune? Head on, she's in your face and mixing you up. Head off, she's in your face and mixing you up, now with head! God forbid you hit a button & get nom'd to death.

Double? Learn one reset, win. It's the same reset. You don't even know it, but you're a Double main. 4/10

Squigly? I hope you weren't planning on standing, jumping, blocking high, blocking low or existing, because you can't punish this skinny bitch.

Big Band is basically glitched Juggernaut with an antiair grab and stupid corner carry. Anything predictable gets a parry punish. 5/10

Eliza? Constant airdash pressure, ridiculous airthrow, full screen grab, hyper armor on Sekhmet, sMP antiair, divekick... a cancer.

Beowulf's dash makes everything too fast an overhead, his cLK has a lot of range, gets anything off of those options. Hype's dumb. FANTASTIC. 6/10

Robo has beams, can just fucking fly away to victory and zone out, sHP stops any approach without armor. And drones.

Fukua's jHK was the product of a degenerate mind. Why would it ever be good to give a command grab to a character with a divekick which can easily crossup? 7/10

But you know what? Neither of these characters is unbeatable. Pressure isn't impossible to get out of. Combos are not infinite. Resets are not impossible to get out of.

My advice to you is LEARN THE BASICS, then learn the no-so-basics. 8/10

Absolute guard, pushblock guard cancel, fast falls, high/low unblockable protection, drama, IPS, burst baits, alpha counters, snapbacks... all those systems exist in the game for a reason.

Literally EVERY character is good. Take your time and learn from their strengths. 9/10

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

Go to http://playskullgirls.com  for resources and ask questions in the discord. The community is one of the most welcoming in the FGC if you want to learn.

Don't just complain; learn to deal with all the bullshit! end/10