A lot of us have spent years being “private” people. We call things boundaries when they are really just boarders around our hearts. We are afraid to practice emotional courage because it’s unpredictable. Whereas, loneliness is predictable and often easier than disappointment.

We disengaged a long time and some behaviors just became habit. By hiding behind “privacy” we have also sent unspoken messages to the people who love us. We have told them that we do not trust them to see, hold, or know us.

These is not how we learn the skills for intimacy.

We have also told ourselves that we cannot be held or known. In an effort to remain “private” we have downplay too many moments that called for family and friends to circle around us.

while we were so busy putting boarders around our hearts everyone around us got closer.

It’s hard to take responsibility for how we feel.

Borders do this. Boundaries set you up to be able to engage in emotional courage, community, and more.

Borders just keep you in.