Whoever invented sandwiches was really in their bag that day

I always appreciated how awesome sandwiches are but I have a newfound appreciation for them in this quarantine. I'm gonna come out this shit a sandwich artiste. I done implemented hoagie rolls and bottles of submarine dressing and some more shit into my sandwich game

Anyway. With this newfound appreciation of sandwiches I just wanna take the time to say fuck Earl of Sandwich and I never bought the idea that he invented the sandwich. He's a lying bitch

Ok for one, Earl of Sandwich lived in the 1700s. The 1700s bro. Humans been eating meat and bread for 30 thousand years and you're telling me NO ONE thought to combine the two until 1748 or some shit

Egyptians created the pyramids 5000 yrs ago. Romans had indoor plumbing 3000 yrs ago. And you're telling me nobody in human history ever looked at some bread and some meat and thought ".....hold up" until some dude thought to do it 250 yrs ago. Nah bro I ain't going

And for two, this dude was an Earl. Rich ppl haven't contributed shit in the culinary field in the big scheme. 99% of the greatest contributions in the culinary world came from poor ppl. Rich ppl have notoriously bad taste buds.

Some poor Italian farmers thought of combining bread, tomatoes and cheese and flipped this whole fuckin world upside down. Some poor Japanese fishers wrapped cuts of raw fish in fermented rice in hopes of preserving their catches and fucked the game up forever

And what's the most famous culinary contribution that rich ppl have given us? Caviar? Nigga....fish eggs?

And thats why it's fuck Earl of Sandwich. Your weak ass aint invent the sandwich. You were just a rich muhfucka who wanted to lay claim to inventing the sandwich who also happened to have a homie with a printing press in the 1700s. Bc you were rich. Bitch I will never forgive you

Fuck Earl of Sandwich. All my homies hate Earl of Sandwich.

And also, for anyone who has now joined the Fuck Earl of Sandwich Club with me.........welcome