2:11AM | Soft Hours

I started this account, on 2nd April. It's been a little over a month. At first, I wondered if it was the right decision. I felt bad for my irls that I was spamming about UWMA on my personal hence why this account was made.

I've run fanaccs before. But in the 2 fanaccs I've created, I find myself running away from both of it. Because of how toxic and tiring it can be. Even online mutuals, only some stayed till now. I didn't feel like I was making friends. So I left.

Coming here, I started fresh. I didn't expect much. I just wanted to be able to find UWMA contents. I didn't know how to interact at first because there was no one. But a small miracle happened. Coo liked my tweet, despite I was just a small account with 7? followers?

He noticed me. It was more than enough. It left a good feeling.

Then after awhile, more and more of you came. There was lots of love being spread. I find myself feeling safe and happy here. I can be myself. I am able to smile more. You guys give so much love thank you.

I tweeted once saying that, it's not easy for me to be happy. It's true. I can be happy while being here, but the minute I get off the phone I'll feel heavy again. But atleast in this harsh quarantine, if I feel down, I can always come here to you guys and feel warm again.

I know I seem like I'm rambling about but I can't seem to put my words together. I don't know how else to express these feelings.

I am just super grateful. This is the first time I've felt so safe and happy within a fandom. It's overwhelming for me.

I find myself do things like editing videos which I've never tried before. I'm contemplating to try and write. I'm reading again (AUs) after having a reading slump for almost a year. It's so healing for me.

So to everyone, I'm sorry for this thread. But thank you. Thank you to everyone who made this space so healthy for me. Thank you for the sweet words and overwhelming love. I will keep loving and appreciating you guys. I want to keep smiling like this. I love all of you.

To UWMA,

thank you for making me fall in love with your story.

thank you for the lessons and emotions.

thank you for giving me a group of amazing idols to love.

thank you for giving me a fandom who are wonderful people that feel like home.

For the last time, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

2:36AM | End