I wish I had a Best Friend

I have lots of good friends, but no best friend. No one who would consider me their highest priority, their future Maid of Honour (lame, but idc)

Someone I could call in a situation like this and just talk and cry down the phone. I don’t have that.
I know this sounds ridiculous, but it’s true and it’s how I’ve felt for years.

I know it’s pathetic. I just want that girl friendship, the one that feels more like a sisterly bond than a friendly bond.

I don’t have that friendship, and right now, I feel like I really need it
Thing is, I know it’s almost 100% my own fault for being a crappy human a lot of the time and for pushing people away. So I don’t really have the right to feel this way.

Good job, Abs. Good job.
I’m sorry, I sound like such a whiny bitch
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