I’ve been single for 5 years now, and I’m beginning to wonder if in that time I’ve developed an idealistic and unrealistic view of relationships. What I want for me, and what I see others experience don’t be adding up

It’s not that I want or expect perfection. But it’s a certain level of peace and happiness and treatment that I want to experience that I don’t see done often. And it’s certain levels of foolishness I don’t want to deal with either.

And in my time of being single, I’ve experienced a lot of people around me be in relationships and observed the commentary and it’s like....it’s “normal” to be dissatisfied majority of the time. Or it’s “normal” to have things to complain about and ...I don’t get it.

I did all the “normal” shit in my last relationship. The settling, the unhappiness, the emotional disconnect, the having things to complain about, hell even being cheated on (it ain’t normal I’m being facetious) and I told myself I’d never deal with that shit again. Ever.

And that’s where my confusion comes from, my experience of the “normal” I remember how empty and unfulfilling it felt. I felt lonelier in the relationship than I did single. So it’s cognitice dissonance to me that people commit to this lifestyle repeatedly.