[the tsukki (ft kuroo) thread that’s probably been made 100 times before but here i am!]

i just want to take a moment to think Again abt how beautifully tsukishima’s character was handled by furudate and how much they care abt him, aka This Is What Tsukki Means To Me +

disclaimers:
-ik a lot of ppl interpret his character differently and thats fine this is just what i took from his story and character
-its also mostly very overstated i am aware
-i am not trying to defend him being an ass

ok thnk u

tsukkis one of the characters who r drastically different from their kid selves and i think a lot of ppl trace that to him catching akiteru’s lie, and ive seen a lot of ppl say they dont think its a “tragic backstory” and say it “wasnt that bad” so here i go

when we’re introduced to tsukki he’s at the epitome of his shame + denial resulting in his emotional detachment + fear of commitment. catching his older brother in his lies Was a big deal but its not purely an “i dont want to get too into volleyball because

i dont want to end up disappointed like him” thing, its a “showing vulnerability by expressing interest in anything be it a person hobby passion is the most horrifying thing i can experience right now because that would mean confronting what i actually want,

and that would mean that there’s a chance i won’t get the thing i want.” thing. may seem like its semantics but the difference is that its not really about volleyball. like of course it manifests that way because it’s a volleyball anime, but we get a big clue pointing elsewhere.

hinata and kageyama piss him off immediately upon meeting them bc they’re so polar opposite of him, being so raw and straightforward with what they desire. he says they irritate him but what they really do is make him afraid.

his emotional detachment from all things related to volleyball is his attempt to deny himself something he actually wants to care about deeply. he keeps himself at a distance and gets irritated at others for not doing so bc theyre a reminder to him,

a reminder of a desire he’s doing everything to ignore + deny. irritation as a defensive mechanism! of course kagehina piss him off theyre the personifications of his worst fear. as tokyo arc comes and the rest of the team start to work harder, invest more time and energy,

tsukishima’s irritation at all of them increase. this is where furudate reveals that biggest hint to his actual character arc through his inferiority complex wrt hinata. yes, he’s stated it to asahi before but here, it’s emphasized by kuroo flatout.

tsukki’s inferiority complex is rly less of an inferiority complex and more of just another attempt for him to run away from his desires (this one being a desire to be hinata’s competitor)

“if i resign myself below hinata forever and insist he’s just better than me, i don’t have to confront that what i actually want is to care and try to not only be his competitor but to beat him.” and this rears its ugly head out at the peak of his “irritation” (denial, fear).

when kuroo unknowingly prods at it. and the thing about kuroo is that he’s probably understood tsukki from day 1. when he accidentally pushes the wrong button he immediately apologizes, which tbh is not something a lot of people would do.

especially considering the culture of hierarchy, it would’ve been much more likely that kuroo wrote off tsukki as rude for walking away, and maybe even feel entitled to HIS apology. but kuroo has the emotional maturity to apologize bc he senses tsukki’s “insecurity” (repression).

and perhaps not right away, but we learn later that kuroo knew pretty much from the beginning how much tsukki was denying himself just through that small blip bc hes right; tsukishima’s “inferiority complex” to hinata is symbolic of his biggest fear of facing his own desires

kuroo catches onto that, quick. he then consistently lags at tsukishima’s side, slowly but surely forming a relationship with him (+ bokuto) by “annoying” him. we’ve established how tsukishima’s “annoyance” really just a defensive mechanism, and kuroo knows that.

he’s purposeful, letting himself be vulnerable (both by showing tsukki he’s serious abt volleyball and by being stupid in regular convos) deliberately for tsukki to see, presenting to tsukki something he’s running away from, and when tsukki warms up to him,

he’s warming up not only to kuroo’s mentorship and friendship but to the idea of pursuing your desires like kuroo. i feel like we don’t really emphasize how tsukki learned to trust kuroo and bo so much; he never says it, ofc he doesn’t.

but not only did he go to them for advice, he heard what bokuto said and took that blind leap, choosing to believe in bokuto’s words and go for it despite years of repression and fear and denial.

that doesn’t happen just bc someone you kind of tolerate gave u some advice. through kuroo (& bo’s) repeated shows of vulnerability they were able to show tsukki it was okay to trust them, and by trusting them it was tsukki’s first step into learning it’s okay to trust himself.

because trusting kuroo and bo is opposite to all his defensive mechanisms; they care. really deeply. by trusting them he’s admitting to himself that he too cares, really deeply. and so he begins dipping his toes cautiously into finally facing himself.

and when the shiratorizawa game happens, and his “moment” finally comes, it’s so cathartic to watch as readers bc it’s infinitely more cathartic to HIM, this first experience of letting himself feel all the desires he’s been denying himself out of fear.

this match is when his inferiority complex over hinata starts having its cover blown too, this panel of him insisting theyre not competing is ironically his first attempt at facing that Yes, he’s ready to let himself care enough to compete now. and that evolves, thru nationals.

i always thought it was interesting how tsukishima never showed any signs of feeling genuinely superior to hinata even when he got invited to the camp and hinata didnt, but its super consistent with how furudate wrote tsukki.

tsukki’s never cared abt how conventionally weak hinata was, it didnt change how he felt inferior to hinata anyway. its really not about hinata, it’s about himself, how he refuses to face his own feelings and his true abilities.

that is what continues past the shiratorizawa match and the 224 of tsukishima’s arc. if his arc was about loving volleyball it shouldve peaked at his “moment”, but furudate goes ahead and gives us this... help i could cry This is his 224. this is his new king of the court is born

“like i could bear to lose to hinata” = he’s finally faced himself and what he desires honestly even at the risk of not being able to reach those desires. “like i could bear to lose to hinata, after all this time that its taken me to finally confront myself.”

it was amazing to see him block ushijima. but to me what tsukki’s arc is about is learning it’s okay to care about things, that your desires are worth being vulnerable over, and that process of slowly undoing the embarrassment and shame and fear in Wanting Things.

and in that regard, his relationship with hinata is what i think was designed to be his true character arc. furudate couldve stopped after shiratorizawa but they didnt; they gave us miyagi camp, and they gave us his entire snotty nationals hinata commentary, and then this.

what’s really wonderful about tsukishima is that he is literally an asshole on top of it being his personality he’s very obviously not at the point of fully accepting that he too has vulnerability. and i like how he’s in that process. its not something that happens overnight.

ik this quote is commonly interpreted as kuroo having been right that tsukki wanted to play volleyball but i like to think of it as he knew what tsukki’s resigned defeat against hinata meant wrt his denial. and hes come so far im so thankful for kuroo and furudate.

[END SUPER LONG FUCKING THREAD HOLY SHIT! IM SORRY. I LOVE HIM!!! also im very aware i did not mention yama and that is on ME. i didnt know where to fit him w/o making it too long and also to me hes part of a whole different tsukki analysis.]

im going to update/redo this thread soon