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Eric's guide to choosing a Bundesliga club, for sojourners from other leagues. [THREAD]
Clubs listed in order of current table position.
Full Disclosure: I support Eintracht Frankfurt and have for a while now, so I am biased. I hate a few of these clubs. I respect many. I even love a couple of them. But you should join me in supporting Die Adler
Full Disclosure: I support Eintracht Frankfurt and have for a while now, so I am biased. I hate a few of these clubs. I respect many. I even love a couple of them. But you should join me in supporting Die Adler
1) Bayern Munich
They've won 7 straight titles dominating the league for the last 50 years. Arrogant. Elitist. The Galactic Empire of football, building their success off the backs of less fortunate clubs. If you love winning at the expense of your soul, welcome to the dark side
They've won 7 straight titles dominating the league for the last 50 years. Arrogant. Elitist. The Galactic Empire of football, building their success off the backs of less fortunate clubs. If you love winning at the expense of your soul, welcome to the dark side
2) Borussia Dortmund
The ultimate 2nd place team. Sexy kits. Incredible fans. Great history. Exciting football. For wannabe hipsters who still want to win, and Liverpool fans looking to connect deeper with their beloved Klopp. Make yourself at home among the virtual Yellow Wall.
The ultimate 2nd place team. Sexy kits. Incredible fans. Great history. Exciting football. For wannabe hipsters who still want to win, and Liverpool fans looking to connect deeper with their beloved Klopp. Make yourself at home among the virtual Yellow Wall.
3) RB Leipzig
Living proof that money ruins football. Ten years ago they didn't technically exist, now they're competing in the UCL. But on the pitch they're really fun to watch. A perfect club for fans of Man City and the Yankees, or if you just really like energy drinks.
Living proof that money ruins football. Ten years ago they didn't technically exist, now they're competing in the UCL. But on the pitch they're really fun to watch. A perfect club for fans of Man City and the Yankees, or if you just really like energy drinks.
4) Borussia Mönchengladbach
Yes, I copied and pasted that. The Everton of the Bundesliga, if Everton were actually good right now. Diamond badge, so that's cool. Club members can purchase a cardboard cutout of themselves to cheer on their club while playing behind close doors.
Yes, I copied and pasted that. The Everton of the Bundesliga, if Everton were actually good right now. Diamond badge, so that's cool. Club members can purchase a cardboard cutout of themselves to cheer on their club while playing behind close doors.
5) Bayer 04 Leverkusen
Big money, never spends it. Perennially competitive, never wins. Arsenal fans: I think I found a club for you! You also might have to give up your opinions on healthcare and throw your support behind Big Pharma, because--ya know--it's good for the club
Big money, never spends it. Perennially competitive, never wins. Arsenal fans: I think I found a club for you! You also might have to give up your opinions on healthcare and throw your support behind Big Pharma, because--ya know--it's good for the club
6) FC Schalke 04
The sleeping giant of the Bundesliga with a rich (distant) history. Dull style of football. Fans pride themselves on their working class identity. If you're one to needlessly remind others that your club has history, the Royal Blues might be right for you.
The sleeping giant of the Bundesliga with a rich (distant) history. Dull style of football. Fans pride themselves on their working class identity. If you're one to needlessly remind others that your club has history, the Royal Blues might be right for you.
7) VfL Wolfsburg
Artificially big club in a small city. Volkswagen money. Some of the best players of the last decade put in a shift for the Wolves, and they might just have some rising stars there now. For fans who like imagining "what if my club never sold their best players?"
Artificially big club in a small city. Volkswagen money. Some of the best players of the last decade put in a shift for the Wolves, and they might just have some rising stars there now. For fans who like imagining "what if my club never sold their best players?"
8) SC Freiburg
The may be small but they're giant slayers. Perennial overachievers. Loyal fan base born in the shadows of the Black Forest, they love football as much they love skiing and eco-friendly politics. For the hipster fan who believes there's more to life than football.
The may be small but they're giant slayers. Perennial overachievers. Loyal fan base born in the shadows of the Black Forest, they love football as much they love skiing and eco-friendly politics. For the hipster fan who believes there's more to life than football.
9) TSG 1899 Hoffenheim
New kids on the block who also buck the 50+1 rule. There was a lot to like about them before manager Julian Nagelsmann left them for the Red Bulls. The club hasn't been the same since. Not much to root for right now unless you enjoy mid-table finishes.
New kids on the block who also buck the 50+1 rule. There was a lot to like about them before manager Julian Nagelsmann left them for the Red Bulls. The club hasn't been the same since. Not much to root for right now unless you enjoy mid-table finishes.
10) FC Köln
The Billy Goats are on the rebound after a season of purgatory in the second division. Lovely city and a great fan culture, but have underachieved for a while now. For the fan of the underdog in big derby matches (M'gladbach, Leverkusen, DĂĽsseldorf).
The Billy Goats are on the rebound after a season of purgatory in the second division. Lovely city and a great fan culture, but have underachieved for a while now. For the fan of the underdog in big derby matches (M'gladbach, Leverkusen, DĂĽsseldorf).
11) Union Berlin
Miraculously earned promotion to the Bundesliga for the first time ever last season. Fans are as interested in the football as they are in their left wing politics. The hipster of all hipster picks.
Miraculously earned promotion to the Bundesliga for the first time ever last season. Fans are as interested in the football as they are in their left wing politics. The hipster of all hipster picks.
12) Eintracht Frankfurt
My club. The stadium is in the middle of a forest. Fans are fun and rowdy (think of a motorcycle club that also cares about anti-fascism & community activism). The team plays exciting--if not reckless--football. Attila the eagle flies around the stadium.
My club. The stadium is in the middle of a forest. Fans are fun and rowdy (think of a motorcycle club that also cares about anti-fascism & community activism). The team plays exciting--if not reckless--football. Attila the eagle flies around the stadium.
13) Hertha Berlin
Not as big as you would guess. They play in the always-empty Olympiastadion, so they might be at an advantage to playing behind closed doors. The club is in the midst of inner turmoil at the moment. Not much to cheer for, but maybe you're here for a train wreck
Not as big as you would guess. They play in the always-empty Olympiastadion, so they might be at an advantage to playing behind closed doors. The club is in the midst of inner turmoil at the moment. Not much to cheer for, but maybe you're here for a train wreck
14) Augsburg
The escape artists of the Bundesliga, fighting off relegation ever since their first and only promotion to the first division in 2011. Living in the shadow of their neighbors Bayern Munich, their fan base is small but loyal. For fans who enjoy football and shrubbery
The escape artists of the Bundesliga, fighting off relegation ever since their first and only promotion to the first division in 2011. Living in the shadow of their neighbors Bayern Munich, their fan base is small but loyal. For fans who enjoy football and shrubbery
15) FSV Mainz 05
The place where Jurgen Klopp worked his craft before the big stage. Let's be honest, Mainz is a quirky place. It's a carnival city, and football will always come second. But their fans are positive and friendly. For fans who just want to see both teams have fun.
The place where Jurgen Klopp worked his craft before the big stage. Let's be honest, Mainz is a quirky place. It's a carnival city, and football will always come second. But their fans are positive and friendly. For fans who just want to see both teams have fun.
16) Fortuna DĂĽsseldorf
Newly promoted and fighting to stay up. They have some history but live in the shadow of their bigger local rivals. The city has a lively punk rock scene that bleeds into some of its fan culture. Cheer them on if you like clubs with funny sounding names.
Newly promoted and fighting to stay up. They have some history but live in the shadow of their bigger local rivals. The city has a lively punk rock scene that bleeds into some of its fan culture. Cheer them on if you like clubs with funny sounding names.
17) Werder Bremen
The Bundesliga has seen its share of big clubs suffer relegation recently, but it would be a shame to see it happen to one of the best fan bases in the league. For those who feel guilty jumping on the Dortmund bandwagon but still want the attractive fan culture
The Bundesliga has seen its share of big clubs suffer relegation recently, but it would be a shame to see it happen to one of the best fan bases in the league. For those who feel guilty jumping on the Dortmund bandwagon but still want the attractive fan culture
18) SC Paderborn 07
Do you believe in miracles?
Do you believe in miracles?
