It is 22.30 on a Sunday, and on the screen of some poor official, working from home, there is a new Word document

It has the title "Technical Document"

The screen is otherwise blank

The official sighs, sips coffee, and begins https://twitter.com/RossMc11/status/1259597306195783680">https://twitter.com/RossMc11/...

Eight hours later, with increases in font size and line spacing, loads of diagrams, and a full page big "R" equation, the draft Technical Document is now nearly 30 pages

Home straight, thinks the frazzled sleep-deprived official, on their tenth coffee

A child starts screaming

"This Page Is Intentionally Blank"

Phew, ten more to go

Hurrah, the official remembers: a preface and big picture of prime minister

31, 32

Back page with legal-looking wording arbitrarily copied from some other official document

33

Executive summary, yes Executive Summary! Thank gods

34, even 35

Title page!

36!

Contents!

37!

Search and replace "Covid 19" with "Coronavirus"

Yes! Edges up to 38!

The official can do this!

Another "intentionally blank" page...

...risky

But well worth the risk at 7am, 39

And last, on front

"KEEP ALERT!" in large, friendly letters

Done!

And send

Damn, damn

50, not 40

Panic

Quick "Last draft was for information only" email

I know, thinks official...

...copies first ten pages, and pastes them at end as "conclusion" but breaks up paragraphs differently

Will this work?

Will it do?

Nobody will realise

Sends