What are you gonna do with a dick that goes down to your knee?

Like... legitimately.

You gonna kill someone with it?

It's not a dick. It's a murder weapon at that point.

Can you use it?

Do you have heart problems?

Can you get hard without passing out or getting dizzy?

Can you fit it in your boxers?

Do you have to tie it to your leg?

What's the logistics, sir?

Do your friends call you the Health Inspector?