I have a lifetime ban from Monopoly after a beach week incident almost a decade ago. Which made this epic surprise gift from @kaysteiger an even more incredible troll than for most people 1/X

(I once found my approach to Monopoly recapped in an article called How to Win at Monopoly and Lose All Your Friends, which is accurate on both points) 2/X https://m.imgur.com/gallery/vX3zm 

A lot has been said about how Ms. Monopoly gives women more money when they pass Go and at the start of the game but I opened the box and there’s SO MUCH MORE

The properties have been replaced by WTF Lady Inventions 4/X

My eyes. They’re rolling so far back in my head. 5/X

If we roll doubles, do we meet cute an architect by adorably tripping and falling into him? 6/X

Are you kidding me? That won’t even get you on a waitlist 7/X

Tokens for a token! Oh! And they kind of but not really acknowledge that Monopoly was STOLEN from a woman inventor like the ones they claim to celebrate with this corporate performative feminism.

BUT I AM SAVING THE MOST OUTRAGEOUS FOR LAST.

They CHANGED THE RULES for houses and hotels so my foolproof way of winning Monopoly no longer applies. 9/X

Which makes this troll even more spectacular. *chef’s kiss* End/X