this morning is exceptionally hard for me having already been in isolation for over 2 months now and having Mother's Day thoughts on my mind. today is affecting me more emotionally than usual, but it's such a beautiful day for so many people, and i am enjoying your joy.

she's dead now and i'm still not over it. that's what therapy is for, right? should have done it decades ago. i think my life would have been different if i had confronted her and faced my fear of her. but instead i weathered her abuse.

it's too hard to get into all of this now, but i need to, but it's just really bad timing being in isolation. so i'll be back on this thread at some point just probably not today. or maybe when the day is dawning.