One of the hardest parts of writing my memoir Grand was reliving the pain of losing my mom, and finding a way to make her live again on those pages. But the *worst* was not being able to ask her questions. If you have your mom in your life still, why not interview her sometime?

Ask her everything you can think to ask. What was she thinking during that hard time when you were too young to understand? What was she like as a teen? What lessons did she learn in her 20s? How did she get through tough times? Did she ever have to forgive herself for a mistake?

Record the interview. And do it again every so often with new questions that arise. Because there will always be new questions. And then when you finally lose her (hopefully many many many many years from now!), you’ll have these tapes and this knowledge to go back to.

Warning: it will never be enough and you’ll still have many questions for her long after she’s gone. (My god I would LOVE to get her SEARING thoughts on Trump!) But every bit you collect now, you’ll be so glad you did.

I have one tape I did with her almost 20 years ago. It was damaged and I could only retrieve part of it and her voice sounds all slow and weird, but it is a treasure.

Now. It may seem tacky to end this thread with a plug, but I can’t think of a better way to honor Billie’s spirit than to toot my own horn. She was the best at self-horn tootin’ and could do it in a way that felt earned and somehow selfless at the same time. So here it is:

HEY YOU! PREORDER MY BOOK! And then zoom your mom. https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Grand/Sara-Schaefer/9781982102210?utm_source=author_post&utm_medium=gallery_social&utm_campaign=&utm_content=