I'm writing this thread on how should be a hindu woman's acharan with whatever little understanding I have. Forgive me for any त्रुटि.

P.S. This is not moral policing or dictation to anyone, it's my personal opinion and experience. Also this thread is concerning women so + https://twitter.com/katyyayanii/status/1257140170823839746

so please don't ask why not men has to do, I'll write on men some other day.

Pre marital conduct

1. Girls should be obedient to their parents, humble and kind towards everyone. It's very important in early stage to learn to respect and abide elders. Greeting to elders +

shld be taught .( In our family tho we wr instructed nt to cm in front of strangers until parents call to introduce u. Nt to speak unnecessarily in btwn elders, might b too much fr some so it's optional). Leaving ur fond memories in parent's home is the aim as u hv 2 leave 1 day

2. Education is a must, according 2 one's capability all women shld educate themselves as they are nurturers f future generations. Extra curricular is gud bt girls shld refrain frm these bollywoodia dance as hobby. Learn classical if u wnt bt this modern dance is pure cringe

3. Moderate career aspirations are okay for wmn, bt family shld not be compromised. Choose careers which u cn manage along with family. Avoid careers in showbiz like modelling or acting.Don't b money minded & proud if u are earning, men r doing tht since ages without any credit

4. All girls shld learn little dharmic chores frm tender age like cleaning puja mandir of home, plucking flowers for puja,decorating mandir ( mother should teach this as a fun activity to children). Knowing components of puja like kalash, deep, dhooni, dhuman, guggul, argha +

panchpaat, naivedya, panchamrit,akshat etc.
Teenage girls should learn traditional things like rangoli/ alpana, in mithila we have different aripans for each occasion. Learn bhajans, lokgeet, Read ramayan if possible, my mom used to make us read 2-3 dohas daily of baal kand, nd+

sandhya vandan she used to make us do aarti, sanjh bati must be done by daughters of house. Also they can do few vrats meant fir unmarried girls. Practice is the only way to follow dharma.

6. Girls should learn cooking, must learn regional cuisine, only we can preserve it by learning it from our grandmothers and mothers. Traditional pakwan made on festivities should also be taught.

7. Coming to marriage, arranged marriage is always best suited for girls, as she has a upper hand in this process, but even if she likes someone should always seek parents permission, no relationship can prosper without parents blessings, whn a father does kanyadan, he must

Be confident abt the person he is giving his daughter to. Don't rob him frm this santosha.

Post marital conduct towards husband

1. Respect is foremost, I hate girls calling publicly or name in front of elders. Add ji in name at least in front of ur elders. In private u
u can.

2. Love him, support him, home is built by both husband and wife, his expenditure is yours too, aim for bigger goals in life like owning house etc than useless expenditures in malls restaurants. This urban lifestyle has increased the average expenditure unnecessarily, get back +

to spending time with family staying at home, doing weekend deep cleanings, cooking special meals and celebrating without any burden.

3. Married ladies should also pay attention to their looks, wear sindur bindi and should look charming to their husbands. Dress for him, not+

For the world. Stay away from attention seeking attire and attitude, only attention u need is from your husband. There are five roops of a grihini towards her husband that should be covered.

4. Make sure your husband is well fed before he leaves for work. When he gets back wait for him to relax and eat before u bring up any issue of discussion . A tired and hungry mind can't process things correctly and can lead to fights.

5. Know his wardrobe. It doesn't matter how you wash clothes or get it washed but you should be well aware of his wardrobe and arrange yourself.
6. Do daily bath and puja tulsi vandana in home, no need to bath only after him, modern life has time constraints so do it according 2

your schedule and make him also do. Do daan from time to time and temple visits with him.

7. If some conflict happens, never sleep hungry or without sorting it out.

Conduct towards In laws

1. Love your husband's family as your own. Give His brothers and sisters same affection as you would give to your own.
Treat his parents as yours but with extra respect. Don't answer back or argue if u don't agree. Talking should be minimal.

2. Never dress inappropriately in front of them, it's a disrespect towards them
Take care of them, if they are sick look after them.
Make then sahbhagi in your life, ask little things how to do even if u know or ask their opinion, it makes them happy

3. Not all in laws are loving but don't reciprocate, not all fights we need to fight ourselves. If you maintain your attitude of respect your husband will take a stand for you himself. That's the best way to tackle them.

4. Know the traditions of new family and act accordingly. Do the fasts or festivals asked by your mother in law. Take responsibility of preserving the tradition and taking it to future generations.

Conduct towards children

1. Motherhood is the biggest blessing as well as responsibility in a woman's life. Highest priority should be give to this phase. Raise your children with utmost care n attention. I strongly condemn this culture f leaving kids on servants or leaving+

creche. You can take help of others but you should be the main sootradhar of your baby's care.

2. A woman who does all enlisted things above will surely raise good sanskari dharmik kids. She will be respected by all and pujniya for them.

Thank you

@ahindu_