as you know, javier and I were talking last year around sept/oct/early november. he spread ruthless lies about me, and with fran’s permission, I’m going to add to this thread with my own experiences, in the hopes that no one else will have to go through this with him https://twitter.com/reylopilots/status/1254644598107803648

this was awhile ago, so pardon if some of the details are a bit fuzzy, I’m going to try my best to recount them as truthfully as I can

with my bpd, I latch onto people so tightly, and he knew this. I told him my fears and he told me to trust him, I shouldn’t have. Our relationship imploded when he told me he got back with fran, I have nothing against her believe me. I feel for her. I felt used and betrayed

people who already didn’t like me, sided against me just bc they thought someone had dirt on me. I had never felt so low and degraded. I was screaming for someone to see the truth

tw/ nsfw
javier and I were mutuals for a bit before talking, our friendship started when I dmed him asking who moon knight was, our friendship blossomed from there, and we talked everyday. feelings started to get involved and it eventually led to us getting sexual on the phone

I genuinely thought he liked me, he even talked about asking me out at disneyland, watching tros with me, and asked if he came out if we’d ever have sex. I started to feel a bit used by him, but naively I brushed it off.

javier was spreading so many lies that someone made a thread about me how I was a liar and a manipulator. I lost SO many followers, people I thought were my friends....I cried so hard, I couldn’t calm down.

this was a really tough time for me, people were spreading lies about me, and it really hurt. I didn’t get why people didn’t believe me, but I was scared and didn’t post screenshots bc I didn’t want things to get worse, but I don’t care now. I need to share

I’m sorry if this thread is long, it’s just so cathartic to say the truth and to feel heard. I feel as if a weight has been lifted off of me

javier and I ended up becoming friends again after this, I don’t even know why I did it. why I gave in. people with bpd have such a strong fear of abandonment that they’ll do anything, sometimes even for the people who abuse them

javier made me feel like it was my fault I was suicidal, that it was something I was burdening him with, he said if I ever felt that way again he would leave...I remember thinking if we ever made things official, he would cheat on me one day