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if i had to be honest, i think my faith isnt really strong anymore since i left to study abroad. when i came back, i sorta lost hope on things, cos life didnt turn out very well and i have a hard time doing extra ibadah. im still doing the wajib stuff, but its soullless
i wasnt feeling very happy yesterday, so naturally i wanted to take some time off to skip terawih, cos its sunat only. but my mom got all whiny abt it and accuse me takde iman n stuff. and told me to not live in this house if i dont solat terawih.. like wth man.
i live with my parents, i PAID for the rent just to help them pay out/fund this house cos they wanted to have 2 house, and bought a lot of things to make their lives easier. like im not throwing to be showy with my money since i earn so little anyway. but at least appreciate?
stuff like this always made me feel bad. i really wanna move out sometimes because of how un-understanding they are... esp my mom
i could always choose to move out, and maybe i should. but i wanted to stay with them to help out with stuff i didnt get to since i spent years away from them. and also i cant do tht cos im sorts trapped in a situation w them rn...
it sucks, i dnt rly have any privacy n freedom. like, u rly dont have to cook for me anyway. i cn find my way to make my own food. everytime i try to make something, esp western food, u dont eat it or want it, jst cos u prefer malay food. when i ask wht malay food u want, silence
even if i did cooked malay food, theres always gonna be a comment like, how my cooking isnt good and all tht. like its not helpful at all... i once got an argument with them some time ago, n theyre like parents is always right.
why cant they acknowledge tht i dont feel very good recently, im struggling to find back my faith tht kept me at peace during college.. wish i have a more understanding parents tht wont push me into anything esp when im not feeling good..
