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Hey, Trump tells it like it is. It’s not his fault it isn’t like he’s telling it or that he’s not telling it in the way you think he’s telling it or even telling it in the way he thinks he’s telling it or that, ha, ha, just kidding, he wasn’t telling it in the way it was meant…
to be heard. No, it’s your fault for not hearing the way he’s telling it in the way it was supposed to be heard, and the way Trump is supposed to be heard is to imagine you are just a guy in a bar listening to another very large gross orange haired guy in a bar with tiny hands…
say crazy things that you can’t quite make out because there are a lot of other drunk people in the bar talking and shouting and also loud music and line dancing and perhaps a bar brawl and definitely gunshots and sirens and, oh great, the back of the bar is on fire, and now...
people are screaming and trying to escape, so, instead of asking what he said, you just nod along politely when you heard that weird thing about drano injections and that other one about putting your lungs in a tanning bed because you just want to get away from him and also…
want to get away from the fire that has now spread and moved much closer to the middle of the bar and because the volleys of gunshots are increasing and also that rabid bear behind the bar that you just now noticed too, but mostly you just really, really, really, want to get...
away from this large bulbous man who you can barely hear, but who still gives you deep misgivings that the things he is telling you that you can’t hear might be worse than the other things that are about to kill you, especially the rabid burning bear that is coming right at…
you and so you just nod politely as you pay your tab so you can run home and dig a hole and hide in that hole for several months to a year or more depending upon certain events that occur in November, and that is how you are supposed to listen to Trump tell it like it is...
cause that is exactly the way he told it to you, you just heard it with too much hearing going on.
