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A couple of people have pointed this out to me, but do I speak too slowly?
maybe the issue is that I need to be more high energy rather than speaking faster.
I just want to grow as an entertainer, I don't want to be making videos a year from now that are not better than I'm making right now.
When I really look over my skillset, I think the thing I'm 'best at', the thing that I feel like I should focus my energy on, is being entertaining and funny. I feel like that's what I can bring to the table.
I don't have the research chops that a lot of my contemporaries have, and I feel in a lot of ways I've been swimming against the current trying to be like they are instead of leaning into the thing I feel like I'm actually good at.
At the end of the day, while people might learn things from my videos I don't feel as though that's what they come to them for. I feel like I'd be better off, and more creatively fulfilled, just leaning in a goofier and less didactic direction.
The problem is that I feel like the thing people want from me, the more 'important' work of explaining political theories or debunking chuds appeals to me less and less.
and that's when the impostor syndrome starts to kick in, what if people don't actually like the work I'm doing, what if they only watch because they agree with my politics?
