A Thread On The Psychology of Loneliness: That I wrote back in 2018 but of course very relevant now… #dejisweeklythreads #MentalHealthMatters #loneliness

So the other day I was having a discussion on Loneliness and someone said that loneliness is not necessarily unhealthy because some people like to be alone (e.g. introverts don’t really like social spaces) and I get what he meant but I still think it’s a dangerous psyche

The wikipedia definition of Loneliness is my fav: Loneliness is a complex and usually unpleasant emotional response to isolation.

I understand that you can be physically alone but not feel alone mentally and you can be in the presence of others but still feel alone (happens to a lot of people at university). Like the several attachments you have are shallow

I think that’s just the first stage in the process of making new loved ones and proper meaningful friendships. I feel like we are in the era of idolising being anti-social, tweets like “when someone cancels and I get to stay at home and sleep” getting loads of cosigns

It’s scary because the more time you spend alone, the less attachments you make and naturally the strength of attachments you do have decline, some attachments are more resilient than others but they are still bound by the same physics

If I don’t see one of my best friends for months normally when we meet up it's still all love and back to normal, but make that years and things will feel different, and of course this varies from friendship to friendship

I get that our generation has social media which allows us to “keep up appearances” but I don’t think it is the same at all, not a phone call nor facetime, I believe there is power in being in each others presence physically (the same rules we apply to our romantic relationships)

Loneliness and depression definitely went to the same school and still best friends now, so try to ration the amount of time you are spending alone, if you have siblings utilise them, if you have friends utilise them, don't depend on social media (of course this is difficult atm)

I spoke to the guy about how I believe that from an evolutionary perspective humans have always sought social interaction. I gave this sick example of how gaming has progressed in the last 20 years...

Before there was no social element to gaming unless you have an awake sibling that was willing play, FIFA used to be about career mode (facing the computer), adventure games were all player 1 vs the algorithms and programmers coding but now it’s all social

COD is the perfect example, the latest COD release there is no offline element at all, as in the game is all online community based gaming, cause that’s popping. I feel like we have this innate motivation to share experiences (both good and bad) with other people

Two sick films that show the psychology of Loneliness are Cast Away with Tom Hanks and Passengers, I think that later is better because in Cast Away the effect of loneliness is confounded by other needs that come with being stranded on an island alone

In Passengers, this guy is alone on a luxury spaceship for months and he literally has everything he could ever want except company, being lonely means he eventually descends into madness and wakes up another passenger which he was not supposed to do, go watch it!!

I’m done! Key points: 1. Loneliness is unhealthy 2. Social time and alone time are both important, find portions that work for you 3. Don’t depend on social media to keep attachments alive 4. Chat to your mates 5. Spread positivity

The timing of this thread may seem “unprecedented” so if anyone has anything to add on how to deal with loneliness and adapt some of the things mentioned above to apply to this time, I’ld like to open the floor to tips, please share....

Make sure you take in my last thread on Self-care https://twitter.com/BIPPNetwork/status/1251452698504953858?s=20