I can& #39;t believe in the middle of a pandemic where I am working well over 50 hours a week at my dad& #39;s store, my dad tells me, "Why are you still playing games and doing nothing with your life. Your cousin took out a 100K loan recently to invest in stuff."

And now I& #39;m up at 4am --

Just thinking to myself how much I just don& #39;t care about any of his expectations, how I& #39;m tired of being told to do whatever I want but then get I& #39;m doing it wrong. I& #39;m tired of being appreciated for my hard work then getting told I& #39;m being lazy. I& #39;m tired of negative renforcment

I& #39;m just constantly getting told by them that I should get a pretty wife and a 6 figure job etc etc but like, have they ever to listened to me saying I just don& #39;t value their shallow and appearance focused platitudes? That I have no pride in my social status?

All I want to do is explore and improve at my hobbies, appreciate art, do stuff with friends. But because My values don& #39;t align with them, my mom cries praying to God that I& #39;ll change. My dad is always yelling. They think they& #39;re failures because I won& #39;t be what they want.

I don& #39;t want them to think that but there& #39;s also no fucking way I& #39;m going to change what I want to bend to them. I can try to communicate this to them but then they just tell me they& #39;ll disown me lmao. I want to make things work with them so I don& #39;t wanna just cut ties off but

It gets harder and harder every time for me to work up the willpower to try and fight back. I& #39;ve made my mom cry. I& #39;ve made my dad furious. This is what happens when I tell them how I feel and they respond with threats and manipulative rhetoric. Just let me live life how I want.