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The impact of years of corruption and crooked leadership is not limited to economic and political instability. The mismanagement of an entire country affects the personal, everyday life, of its citizens. It has certainly affected mine, and today was a prime example.
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As some of you may know, my 3 siblings live, work, and have families abroad across three different continents. After finishing their education, they had to leave to establish themselves abroad, cuz they sure as hell were not going to get rewarded for their efforts in their home
Of course this comes as no surprise to everyone reading this, as i am SURE you all have relatives who had to leave for similar reasons. After years of watching their children grow and succeed, only interaction my parents had access to was 3 different skype calls every evening.
This was also the case for my uncle and his daughters. He lived here while they worked abroad because our own homeland had very little to offer in return for hardwork. Regardless, we managed. We had to. We all do, right?
Well we all do until the need for human interaction arises and all you have access to is skype calls with a shitty internet quality.
Today such a need arose, today my uncle passed away. A slap in the face at a time when the country is already almost literally crumbling.
Today such a need arose, today my uncle passed away. A slap in the face at a time when the country is already almost literally crumbling.
I felt what everyone felt at first, this thread isn't about grief and handling it. This is about those feelings i had that were unfamiliar. New feelings, brought upon by a grim reality i have 0 control over. I was all alone. Helping my father face this despite the pain he was in
And tending to my tearful mom. How do i involve my siblings? How do i break it to them? What can they even do from where they are at such a time? What the fuck are my cousins going to do... Their father has passed and they cant even hug or kiss his dead body.
A quiet day to reflect. Our family barely even spoke about how they felt, we just cried in silence. Who were we going to open up to? There's so few of us left here.
I miss my uncle and i love him, and it pains me that he passed away far from his kids, and that we must grief alone
I miss my uncle and i love him, and it pains me that he passed away far from his kids, and that we must grief alone
When we ask for change, it is not just because i want to see tourists walking down my street every day all year long, or because I want a currency that competes with the dollar, it is not just for better judicial bodies and a true independence from nepotism and sectarianism
We are also asking for change so that Lebanon feels like a comfortable home again. A home where when the time comes, and you desperately need those you love, you have a shoulder to cry on and not a Skype call to a different continent.
May you rest in peace 3ammo Mahmoud 
i love you and the change to come will be in your name and in the name of all those who suffered alone, till death sometimes, because of failed leadership and endless greed.
i love you and the change to come will be in your name and in the name of all those who suffered alone, till death sometimes, because of failed leadership and endless greed.
