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i used to experience split attraction (asexual/acespec and pan-/biromantic) but now my orientations align with each other and BOY, i can tell you, not experiencing split attraction is a PRIVILEGE.
when people ask me what my sexuality is, it& #39;s much easier to describe myself with one word (bi) as opposed to at least two (asexual, panromantic (, pansensual)). people know what bi means, but most people don& #39;t really get the difference between sexual and romantic attraction, or
they have a really really bad idea (and they probably also don& #39;t know other types of attraction that can be part of someone& #39;s sexuality. so it& #39;s either having to explain your sexuality or only mentioning a part of it (probably pan because people don& #39;t get asexual either).
and in surveys where they ask your sexuality, even lgbt+ ones? all the options would have the -sexual ending. meaning i could only ever name my sexual orientation and my romantic orientation would be erased, i would be reduced to one thing. now i feel comfy just ticking bisexual.
when you feel split attraction, most people will only see a part of you. they will only acknowledge the sexual part and assume the romantic part is the same. though honestly i would have rather put my romantic orientation down than my sexual one, because i& #39;d rather define myself
by the attraction i do feel than by the attraction i don& #39;t. but i never felt seen by the pan*sexual* label. when your orientations align, you can just choose one without problem, because the -sexual labels are used to mean everything.
and then there& #39;s lgbt+ culture and communities. this doesn& #39;t really apply to people who identify as gay or lesbian because those labels don& #39;t have -sexual or -romantic at the end. but so many things are specifically aimed towards bi*sexual* people. if you are bi but not
bi*sexual* this can really alienate you from a community that& #39;s supposed to be yours.
and this of course doesn& #39;t only apply to aspec people who experience split attraction. imagine being bisexual and homoromantic and having to choose which part of you gets seen today. aligned orientation is a privilege.
