y'know, I thought that when I moved out? I had escaped this kind of narcissistic gaslighting.

And you might say "don't pay any attention to it"...

ok, let's put aside for a moment that my work requires that I not only pay attention to it, but that I try, as best anyone can, to fight it. let's ignore that for a moment.

he's preventing me from getting medical care I need

i care about other people – i think, fundamentally, that's what separates us from them. and so I can't just ignore it - i can't ignore the pain and suffering he's gratuitously inflicting on others.

but i think it's also important to recognize, that for some of us, too many of us, abusive assholes like this are why we couldn't do things like access medically necessary care when we were subject to their control