Happy birthday to Charles Ferguson Smith -- Grant’s mentor and the dictionary definition of a “tough old sonofabitch.” He’s not a household name, cuz he died early in the war, but his profanity-laced tirade toward his raw recruits at Ft. Donelson is a masterpiece of the genre ...

The no-nonsense Smith had been Commandant of Cadets at West Point when Grant was there, but he happily served under his former pupil. “General, I am now a subordinate,” Smith told Grant. “I know a soldier’s duty. Pray, feel no awkwardness whatever about our new relations.”

Still, as Grant learned to command an army, he and his aides looked to the elder Smith for guidance. (Wouldn’t you? Just look at that face -- he’s like an 1860s Gandalf, ready to deliver gruff droplets of wisdom during the “Call to Adventure” portion of The Hero’s Journey.)

Fort Donelson was Smith’s finest hour. Grant went to his former teacher and told him, “Gen. Smith, all has failed on our right -- you must take Fort Donelson.” Smith leapt to his feet, he BRUSHED HIS MUSTACHE (that’s how you know it’s serious), and replied: “I will do it.”

“I want this regiment to carry that fort, yonder, at the point of the bayonet and without firing a gun until you get inside of their works,” Smith told the 2nd Iowa. “You will be well-supported, a whole brigade will follow at your heels.” And he'd go along, too. #WouldntMissIt

At times during the advance, Smith did NOT like what he saw. "Damn you gentlemen, I see skulkers, I'll have none here!” Smith roared. “Come on, you volunteers, come on! You volunteered to be killed for love of country, and now you can be!”

How’s THAT for a Mid-Charge Pep Talk?

But Smith wasn’t done. “You are only damned volunteers!” he shouted. “I'm only a soldier, and don't want to be killed, but you came to be killed and now you can be."

(Okay … so it’s not exactly Henry V or Bravehart or even Bill Pullman from “Independence Day.” But it’s close!)

Smith rode on horseback to inspire his new troops; at one point his cigar was shot away from his lips, whereupon he achieved “Civil War Status: VERY COOL” by calmly taking out another stogie and asking an aide for a light. Still, he was NOT a fan of his own heroic exploits ...

“My blood runs cold when I read such stuff as that I put my cap on my sword, etc,” he wrote his wife. “I did no such ridiculous thing. I certainly did use my sword in waving people on etc. & would like to have used it extensively on those who went back; but not the cap business.”

I love how Smith is so crusty he seems truly chagrined about “the cap business.” He’s like: “Okay, sure, maybe I waved my sword around a bit, and I wanted to stab a few cowards, but I NEVER put my cap on the end of my sword. What do you take me for, a THREE MUSKETEER?!?”

C.F. Smith was so respected he was briefly put in charge of the army when Halleck removed Grant from command. And when Grant was restored at Lincoln’s behest, nobody was happier than Smith, who said Grant had been “unceremoniously and … unjustly stricken down.”

Grant wrote he “would have served faithfully under Smith” and Sherman speculated, “Had C. F. Smith lived, Grant would have disappeared from history after Donelson.” But Smith had a freak accident getting into a rowboat, and he was on his deathbed during the Battle of Shiloh.

Grant was distraught at Smith’s death. But Smith left his mark: At Donelson, Grant asked him how he should reply to the surrender offer.

“No terms to the damn Rebels,” Smith growled.

Grant decided to be nice and reword it as: “Unconditional Surrender.”

And a legend was born.