Just poked a Finish Powerball right up me shitbox, lads.

Stay tuned for updates.

Update: Frothier than expected, strong fizzing sensation, farting bubbles, but remaining free of respiratory illness.

Further update: Crippling stomach pains, prolific rectal bleeding, still Covid-free.

Supplementary update: Some breathing difficulties now, but think they’re largely down to the agonising pain coupled with the shock of witnessing something that I believe was once my colon slipping out of my anus and landing with a wet plop on the bathroom floor.