Ok. We know Trump is a maniac. Mad, bad, ill, who knows? But let's have a bit of fun. 7 months from now it's possible he'll lose the election. Not probable, yet, but possible. Think for a few seconds about what that means.... 1/

First up, there will need to be a concession speech. It'll have to happen. If he's beaten by electoral college votes, but polls more actual votes, that would be the most amazing thing. I mean it would be appointment viewing... 2/

But whatever happens, landslide or tight as a ducks arse, he'll have to concede, and I don't think he will enjoy that. I don't think he has the ability to be magnanimous in defeat and to congratulate his opponent. He may attempt it, but it'll last seconds... 3/

Instead, what I think we will get will resemble a gatling gun being operated by a deranged chimpanzee. Bullets of blame fired off in every conceivable direction. Utterly out of control, spraying bullshit through 360 degrees... 4/

And a huge amount of self pity, mixed in with self aggrandisation. "I was literally the best president the US ever had, everybody said so, but that wasn't enough for the dems, who were nasty and had the fake news" ad nauseum... 5/

However, as much fun as the concession speech would be, it would be but an appetiser when you consider exactly how the President Elect's inauguration ceremony would go. 6/

Think about that. It's usually jovial, lots of backslapping, former presidents smiling and exchanging Pleasantries. Mr and Mrs Obama will be there, radiating smugness. Bill and Hillary will be there, smiling smiles brighter than a thousand sharpened blades.. 7/

And there will be Donald and Melania. Both wearing faces like slapped arses. She doesn't seem to be able to help it, in fairness, and it's hardly surprising. Will he be able to be jovial, collegial at all? Or will he be sulking like a grounded 12 year old?.. 8/

I think I know which. And I can't fucking wait to see it. /end