never let it be said i won't try anything at least once

if you lose me to the abbreviations.... know that i went willingly and lived well

i, for one, think we should bring back casual maskwear. it's a good look, hot look

anyway hand to god i could not tell you a single thing that's happening in this show

hey upper east siders, here's the story so far: sixteen years ago, wei wuxian had them all shakinnnngggg! now he's come back (how? we don't know! why? revenge maybe!) and he's kicking around on a donkey while dumbledore (potentially his husband?) and his acolytes look for him

oh shit let me whittle a flute real quick

this bitch a cop?

we loving this evil bitch

knew i'd been here before

when he was like 'only family or significant others can touch my headband' and then 20 minutes later wrapped it around wei wuxian's wrist lmaoooo

this episode has asked me to accept bunnies with magic headbands and THE TORTOISE OF SLAUGHTER so you know, it's been a lot

what the fuck

i love that this is his one face, king of underemoting

and yes i DO look forward to when he eventually IS emotionally compromised because the angush will be even better

THE BRUTALITY WITH WHICH THEY FUCKED IT UP I'M SHAKING

real catelyn stark hours whew

this lotus pier family tragedy is all very compelling but i haven't seen the cranky one for like four episodes and i want him to be upset about these goings on, is that too much to ask?

these are my needs: to watch lan wangji emotionally crack like a glowstick

SOME TYPEA QUEEN SHIT i love HER

sorry call me problematique but i kind of love this crazy grinning demon

a scene with all the qishan kids please can you imagine that amount of chaotic energy in one room

you really think someone would do that? put a 20 minute flashback in this episode just to make me feel like shit?

BUT WHAT DID HE GIVE UP TO RESTORE JIANG CHENG'S GOLDEN CORE

has everyone just FORGOTTEN about the iron WHATEVER? there's a WAR going on and now wei wuxian's the fucking pied piper of the evil spirits or whatever? i'm stressed

TWENTY ONE EPISODES IN and someone FINALLY called wei wuxian UNTAMED

i mean the obvious answer is that he gave up HIS OWN golden core which, sure, but then how can he be making jank evil reversed talismans? i still understand nothing about the magic system in this world so it probably was just his own golden core lol. but also WHYYYYY

it's some serious dumb brother shit to be like, 'walk up this mountain in a blindfold and find the immortal lady and she'll give you your magic back' and for the other brother to be like 'sounds legit!' WHAT THE F

when wei wuxian was like 'this is some family revenge stuff better fuck off now :)' and lan wangji sadly walked away but as soon as his back was turned wei wuxian's face just CRUMPLED in sadness THANKS I HATE IT

some real 'don't go where i can't follow' business WOOWWWWW

never done a thing wrong in her LIFE

me: goth orpheus.
you: elaborate on that
me: no

wei wuxian chuckled. 'you mean the chaos emeralds?'

oh big grima wormtongue energy from this motherfucker from the start

oh i BET HE FUCKIN DID

narrator: little did wei wuxian know, when lan wangji said 'shut the fuck up' what he really meant was, 'i love you'

google earth... always takin pics

look at mr 'i don't like to be touched' getting all handsy. well well well how the turntables

HAHAHAHAHA

collab of the year.... whens the mixtape dropping boys

grand master: you must remember that DISCIPLINE is the motto of our clan
lan wangji: ok cool but just quickly CAN i enter the forbidden room to read the books to compose some music to save my boyfriend from his evil flute

lan wangji trying to figure out how wei wuxian captured 30 percent of the prey on the mountain when they had spent the entire hunt flirting with eachother and making pacts of fidelity

wei wuxian: if i want to kill someone, whose gonna stop me? whomst the fuck can stop me????
lan wangji: wei ying
wei wuxian:

when you just wanted to go for a nice stroll in the rain with your umbrella but your boyfriend starts using his flute to resurrect the dead again

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK

they really fucking did this and thought it was okay

me, knowing full well she has a son in the flashforwards and he's most likely her husband: you don't DESERVE HERRRRRR you don't deserve her lotus and rib soup you ungrateful BETCH

uncalled for

me trying to figure out if wen qing has feelings for jiang cheng: she doesn't seem to react much when he's around.... BUT she kept the comb... but she never came to him when she was dying in the streets... BUT she seemed sad when she gave it back... girl give me something here

me 30 episodes deep into this show: what does this narrative remind me of?
me:
me: THERE'S BEEN SOME CONFUSION OVER ROOMING HERE AT SHIZ

EPISODE 31 OH FUCK SHIT JUST GOT REAL

not letting the demon snake things attack lotus pier crew.....

YOU MOTHERFUCKER I FUCKING KNEW IT FUCKING BROKE BITCH WITH THE DAMN FLUTE OH MY GODDDDDD

things have developed and i have to tell you i'm having a pretty shit time right now

wei wuxian said y'all mind if i go apeshit

OHHH FUCK THIS SHOT the cinematic quality of this battle wtf it's amazing... the score?! gamey throney fuggin WISHES

OHHHHHHHHH FUCKIN FUCK

DEAL WITH HIM, LAN WANGJI

i KNOW the marks on lan wangji's back are because of some love dedication shit and i can't WAIT for this reveal lay it on meeeee

oh wow wei wuxian being dead for 16 years and then suddenly being back and constantly grabbing at lan wangji's arms lmao i feel bad for this grief stricken touch starved bitch but also.... suffer handsome man

CAN WE NOT

hey siri google 'is offering to carry someone a love language'

listen

wei wuxian: kick his ass baby i got yo flower

okay so xue yang is in LOVE with him im... wow

i gotta say i planted this seed back in episode 12 or whatever and i have seen it harvest

sorry but he is the moment

he;s really CLEANING THE BODY WOW IT'S 12:38AM HERE AND IM MCFREAKIN LOSIN IT

now when we say absolutely fucking crackers

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

sometimes love looks like cutting out the tongues of villagers so you and your righteous blind nemesis can kill them as a bonding ritual and that's okay

he really said, 'sorry it couldn't have been my boyfriend. the evidence? we are gay'

what the audience needs is an empathy flashback episode with mr lan wangji

slap one of them gingerbread men cutouts on his cute lil headband i want the full heathcliff, 16 years of him in pain looking for a way to bring wei wuxian back

when you read the collection of turmoil in the forbidden chamber

zewu jun: you believe that your boyfriend is right. but i believe that my boyfriend is right. why is your judgement better than mine, brother? we are at an impasse.
lan wangji: i guess
lan wangji:
lan wangji: - eXCEPT that my boyfriend is HOT and RIGHT and yours is WRONG and DUMB

THE THREE YEARS OH MY GOD NOOOOOO

i KNEW that kneeling in the snow business that they just dropped on us no explanation was gonna come back AND IT DID but little did i know the answer was going to be MOMMY ISSUES lan wangji steadily rising on my list of favourite characters i'll tell you what

me watching this: obviously the answer is LOVE, he was corrupted by LOVE for YOU wei wuxian
the show: it was for love
me: AAIIIIIIIIAFDBSFIVBDSFBVDSLIBDSFBVDSJHBVJKDSHBVD

he brought him emperor's smile i -

when wei wuxian was like, 'i always thought it would be jiang cheng and me together forever and lan wangji against us.... but here i am and it's the other way around' y'all mind if i FUCKIN LOSE IT

two guys standing ten feet apart in a prison house that was built for one of their mothers thinking about how much they have sacrificed for eachother while the snow falls is actually something that can be so personal

LMMAOOOOOOO wei wuxian really said 'i'll deflect by playing to his protective side' and it WORKED

are you telling me that lan wangji saved this kid.... and raised him... because - oh my god....

HE WENT AND FOUND YUAN AFTER THREE YEARS IN THE FUCKING PUNISHMENT CAVE ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW

lan wangji sittin in that cave making his to do list for when he gets out the joint: first, find body of beloved slain on the rocks beneath nightless city. second, find foster child of beloved and raise him as my own son. third, find a way to bring beloved back to life

the best thing about this is, if it had been the other way around you know wei wuxian would have like, mourned but ultimately gotten on with things, but lan wangji is like, 'i will reshape my entire life and make it a monument to my love' because he's secretly extra as fuck

y'all gonna make me lose my mind, up in HERE up in here

love how lan wangji for about ten episodes has been like, 'you died once and i wasn't by your side so i'm literally never leaving you again' LOVE THAT FOR THEM. LOVE THAT FOR ME

MY PSYCHO SWEETIE HE'S BACK

OHHHHH SHIT OH SHIT

a literal SWOON

OH GOD CRYING THE SINGLE MANLY TEAR FOR HIS MAN.... our king of underemoting is big mad i cannot

WELP WE FOUND OUT https://twitter.com/miccaeli/status/1254033718773051392

why are they always literally art

lan wangji trying to figure out how the love of his life was a big enough dumbass to risk spiritual open heart surgery for two days completely awake with only a fifty percent chance that he'd survive it

clan leader su: you think you're better than me
lan wangji: i am better than you

LOOK WHOS COMIN IN CLUTCCHHHHH

sleeves long enough to protect your boo from the puppy

i've been reliably informed about how lan wangji got the wen clan brand on his chest

(grabs your shirt and shakes you) there's a Very Important Fight going on but lan wangji only cares about watching wei wuxian, do you GET it

i hate it here

the most beautiful man i think

me listening to this nonsense explanation

(softly) don't.

oh god last ep i'm not ready i'm not ready

so you're telling me jiang cheng got captured.... distracting the guards from wei wuxian..........

absolutely not

sometimes a family is two wizard dads, their adopted son, and the spirit snatched zombie boy they keep rescuing

LAN WANGJI I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY

and so the required reading begins

the noise you hear is the deep inhale proceeding a scream

'the series depicts a fictional Xianxia world where humans attempt to cultivate to a state of immortality' wait WHAT lmfaoooo i just watched 50 episodes set in this world and no one said this to me even once....

'Zewu-Jun even refers bitterly to Wei Wuxian as "the only mistake Lan Wangji made in his life"' LEGENDS ONLY LMFAOOOO you know you that bitch when you cause all this conversation!

this motherfucker... THIS MOTHERFUCKER RIGHT HERE!!!

HIS NATURAL COLDNESS I. FUCKIFNFNJFJFNFMMDMDKS

YESSS the set design of this series was fucking IMMACULATE and i loved how the design of each clan's stronghold reflected their personalities???? the detail!!!!

it's deeply upsetting to ME that wei wuxian and jiang cheng didn't set the record straight about the SECOND FUCKING FLUTE PLAYER like heal the rift, boys! heal the rift!!!!!!!!!!!!

not to be an absolute weenie about it but like, wei wuxian straightening the headband in the morning just completely casual, but lan wangji being Moved every time

that's all i have to say about that

when wei wuxian was like, 'there's only two sentences a man needs to learn: i'm sorry, and thank you' and when wei wuxian was like, 'lan zhan... i'm sorry. and thank you'

YOU WANT ME TO DIE?? THAT'S WHAT YOU FUCKING WANT?

me watching this scene knowing that he was gonna look back on this for sixteen years and hate himself for not doing it: i came here to have a good time and i'm honestly feeling attacking right n

lan wangji: i will bring him to cloud recesses, and save his soul, with my love. and music. but mostly love

we're watching this scene again Knowing What We Know and WOOOOOWWW the precision with which wei wuxian went for the fucking JUGULAR here trying to push lan wangji away DELICIOUS DELICIOUS

THAT'S SEROTONIN LUV

it lichrally hurts my heart they didn't get one last scene together like

wei wuxian chucking over that cliff: just let me go...
lan wangji:

look it was a trauma thing but it was also a horny thing. wow

not to be wuthering heights on main but lan wangji is the actual embodiment of 'the entire world is a dreadful collection of memoranda that he did exist and that i have lost him' and that's where i am at right now

but wei wuxian saying that lan wangji would know if he had gone too far and needed to die and lan wangji literally talking him off the cliff because he didn't want him to die and like what if the one person you trust to balance you never can because they lOVE YOU

'lan wangji! sooo much has happened since we last saw each other! family got murdered, home got invaded. then my brother nearly died, then wen qing sucked my golden core out with a slurpee straw, then i got dropped in the burial mounds, and now i'm a necromancer! how's you?'

♪ two brooos, chillin on a slate roof, five feet apart cause theyre not g

i laughed so hard what the fuck comedy king

he didn't need to be this hot... he did that for us

omfg the LOOK lan wangji gave him i was on the floor.... like 'you dumb slut i'm in love with YOU what's not clicking what's not clicking' he was about to lose his damn mind in that cave

that smile DO NOT touch me