Sooo... The EPA has put out a list of approved disinfectants for COVID-19. (Of note, it's the same list used for SARS and COV2). https://www.epa.gov/pesticide-registration/list-n-disinfectants-use-against-sars-cov-2

Look closely at the column labeled "contact time" and tell me which disinfectant that kills viruses in 1 minute that you'd like to put in your lungs. Hydrogen peroxide?

2% Sodium hypochlorite solution? (Worthy of note, although Clorox keeps their exact concentration a trade secret, it's no more than 10% Sodium Hypochlorite. So who's up for a cocktail of 1/4 cup bleach, and 1 cup water?

What about Quaternary Ammonium? It's listed as an oral acute toxin (category 4).... not as bad as others...

Honestly.. the only sanitizer on the EPA list for COVID19 that disinfects in one minute that I'd be willing to ingest is Ethanol. And if the President is suggesting that's what we need to do in order to kill the virus... I'm willing to do my part as a patriotic American...

Granted, it may be a challenge to get my blood up to the minimum 70% ethanol required to kill the virus. But again, if the President is asking me to...

I'm a taller individual, so I have roughly 1.5 gallons of blood coursing through these veins. So I have to figure out how to turn my blood into 1.05 gallons of ethanol... or 134.4 oz of ethanol... better go 135, just to be safe.

An average beer has 0.5 oz of beer. So I need to consume 270 beers in one sitting.

But somehow, 3,240 oz of liquid seems a little excessive? Perhaps I could do 270 shots of Whiskey?

So I've got my Coronovirus plan all thought out. I need to keep 2.11 gallons of whiskey on hand... just in case I get the Rona... Thanks Mr. President! (Don't really do this, you'll die of alcohol poisoning).

WAIT... DOES THIS MEAN I CAN USE MY HSA ACCOUNT TO BUY BOOZE!!!?!?!?!?!?!

PSA: Don't try to get your blood level to 70% Ethanol. As with all the sanitizers on the EPA approved list, you will die.