One of the first and most helpful things the clinical neuro-psychologist I saw for cPTSD therapy did was explicitly dispense with the notion that any post-trauma or triggered reaction amounted to “letting” emotions “control” you.

It’s unhelpful framing, it ignores the complexity of triggered feelings, *especially* in cPTSD, & comes dangerously close to rendering the effects of neurological changes due to unreasonable external pressures as character failings

The character failing belongs to perpetrators

Far better to instead talk to bullies, liars, abusers etc about not being “controlled” by their compulsive need to harm people, & to always have a victim they can reach and control.

Save the permissibility language for the people who cause this damage, not those in the aftermath

A lot of people with PTSD/cPTSD have been forced into suppressing their natural reactions in order to survive or manage abusive situations.

This was done to me.

By structuring therapy around similar concepts you risk replicating the traumatic situation.

We just won’t heal.