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I see people still do not accept that trauma is a medical condition. If you have any empathy whatsoever you are most likely going through a stress response, resulting in trauma, which is eating up your energy levels. You MUST rest, without guilt, to mitigate the damage https://twitter.com/jonathanshalit/status/1252943902501474304
I‘ve been displaying acute symptoms of PTSD for almost a decade & was finally diagnosed a few years ago, likely I have had trauma for far longer. The most damaging thing was the guilt I had at not being productive, so I forced it, which made recovery impossible & symptoms worse
My mother today asked “why am i so exhausted?” I really hope me going through all this rubbish at least helps someone: You have permission to rest. No one gave me permission so I kept going and absolutely crushed myself into the ground, which resulted in VERY bad symptoms.
A stress flight or fight response to the very terrifying pandemic is tearing through you like running from a v hungry lion. Your body stops prioritising memory, thoughts of the future, lateral/complex planning, just immediate survival. This is okay, it is helping you survive.
But of course you are burning immense amounts of energy just trying to survive. You might be a LOT hungrier or you might be so stressed you forget about food. Both are normal, I’ve gone through both. Either way, listen to your body, feed and hydrate it however you can and rest.
Here’s the thing. This stress response is generating trauma. Currently this is short term, but it will bake in if you’re not careful and create lasting damage. What created long term damage for me was GUILT and PRESSURE and SHAME that I was a burden, not good or productive enough
Therefore I didn’t rest. I didn’t share this. I didn’t seek help. I didn’t escape quickly enough from toxic people who made me feel guilty for it all. I worked and suppressed it & I became miserable & it turned into a long term depression, and unbearable terrifying panic attacks
But you do not need to go through what I went through. Do not listen to these wildly misinformed productivity shame influencers. Do not hold yourself to old standards. Do not feel guilt or shame. Start to take care of yourself, like you would a beloved pet who is suffering.
Here’s what helped me mitigate trauma. Firstly, rest. Your body, physiologically needs time to heal and repair. Sit. Bathe. Lie down. Stare. Sleep. I couldn’t make it from the toilet to my bedroom without having to rest. Why didn’t I LISTEN!?!? Your body is wise. Listen to it.
Secondly: Escape & repetition. Think of it as a holiday to give your brain a fighting chance. Switch OFF the news & watch what you love & know by heart. I rewatched Star Trek, Seinfeld, Outer Limits, Red Dwarf, X Files uh & Castle. So familiar you don’t have to pay attention
Let these shows be lovely companions to you that your brain can nicely passively focus on while you rest or do something else. Memory and concentration go so fast so I found longform reading, especially fiction to be impossible as it requires a certain focus of the imagination
Some people use video games but I find it requires just too much concentration & I don’t have the patience. Numbing is good. Switches the brain off. But, whatever works. Old films. Rewatch things you love. They are nostalgic beautiful enveloping hugs. Let them embrace you.
Thirdly: Hydration and food. I admittedly bought plastic bottles to keep in my room as I couldn’t face going to the kitchen to get water. This was the ONLY way to keep hydrated so I did it. I upgraded to carton water & glass (fancy) & finally a Brita tank. No shame. Stay watered.
Food, my god, the shame surrounding food is a HORRIBLE thing. Prioritise calories. Joy is few and far between so eat whatever you want, whenever you want. No shame. No guilt. I got REALLY into spicy food just to feel something. Frozen meals & microwaves are your friends.
Obviously it isn’t as simple as me waving the wand over a banquet chanting “no shame” and solving body dysmorphia. I suffer from this acutely. There is no magic trick. Just, keep eating the things that you love. I.... uh found that my bowels gave me all the feedback I needed
Fourthly. (Sorry this thread... I went through a decade of this so i could talk for ages) Stop talking to people who make you feel like you are not good enough. You KNOW who they are. What the hell. You are too old to put up with this shit. They can go to hell. Do it from today.
Prioritise people who fucking adore you. Don’t have them around you? I didn’t. I had to search, reignite old friendships. Am still in the process. They are out there. 
I met someone almost 2 years ago who made me realise holy shit, so THIS is friendship & it changed my life
I met someone almost 2 years ago who made me realise holy shit, so THIS is friendship & it changed my life
From my dad I have this unconditional chivalric notion of friendship. It’s very idealistic & puts me in a vulnerable position. I didn’t think it existed until this one new person. Who makes new friends in their 30s?!? It is possible. You are worth continuing to search.
Real friends do not make you feel like a burden & do not make you feel guilty for anything. Real friends think you literally spin gold out of your ass. Here I was with an ass FULL of gold & I didn’t even know. Spend time with people who constantly tell you about your golden ass.
Sorry this just spewed out without a real plan. Pls ask if you have any questions. A PANDEMIC is a REAL, FRIGHTENING thing. This is not a normal time, take care of yourself and don’t be gaslit into thinking any different xxxxx
I have to add a critical thing. To be able to rest at all is a privilege. There are some who cannot because of work, family duties, inequalities, no space. Help each other have time for themselves. Try & cordon off space for yourself however you can. Be understanding. It is tough
I live alone but I have a select few friends and family members I speak to text every single day. They are absolute anchors. They’re so very important to me. I know I did not always have this so I am so very grateful. Find your lovely anchors and cast them. Be anchors for others.
