Part of ADHD is listening to your brain&rest of body as energy levels are extremely important

Been trying different schedules, as I was on 8-4 as I was on boarding a new compliance officer.

Normal hours are a no go.

If the sun is up, I have a real hard time doing what I’m supposed to do, especially if routine, mundane or low impact.

My brain really wants to use energy to explore or rest, not exploit.

Why would you waste this opportunity to seek something new, novel?

However, when everyone else is sleeping, I feel like I’m tricking the rest of the world

I can study, focus for hours on end, reply to emails from weeks ago that I’ve been putting off. I can clean, organize, I have space and time to think complete thoughts.

When people are expecting something from me, it’s almost like an intense anxiety, rebelliousness, agoraphobia and a weird form or sloppy perfectionism take over and paralyze action. Feels like I’m missing an angle, a motive, a piece of the puzzle (where the haze and fog cover)

To the observer, which sometimes includes part of myself, it looks like procrastination, self sabotage, disorganization

But to the brain experiencing thought in the moment, it’s a tsunami of possible, virtual worlds coming into a cacophony of Being, endless permutations collide

And why commit to a path of mediocrity when there’s a potentially exciting New Idea or Better Way? Wasting many hours mentally optimizing things I have no business doing, no engineering talent to make actual, no plausible scenario to need this Idea yet here we are, there we were

My problem now, schedule wise, is finding enough consecutive hours to sleep. My best sleep is from 6a-10a, 2p-6p (important hours if you work in equities)

I also seem to alternate between needing a 5 hr block + 4 hr block and a solid 7-9 in a row.

I’ve heard of some people using a 30 hr day because of their sleep/wake cycles, and it’s an interesting idea. Maybe I’m living 16 hr days, who knows.