There’s this audio on tik tok about hyperfixation, and people use it to show off their hug ass collections of products related to what they are fixated with. I have come to the conclusion that there’s a bit of privilege showing off that hurt me a bit- starting thread

I am autistic. I’m deciding now more than ever to be open about it bc I’m tired of masking or having to explain myself. Masking is when you catch on others people “common” behavior bc you think that’s normal. Tbh most of the time i don’t understand half of the emotions people +

+display. Along with my autism, there’s lot of hyperfixation. Owl City has been my favorite band since I was 12. Batman. HSM. LEGOs. Pokémon. Digimon. Reptiles. Some book series. However, in my household this type of “obsession” over stuff was strictly not allowed.

I was shamed growing up whenever I showed my passion for certain topics (math and science too, you are damn right), so my dear masking mechanism trained me to like things just oh my phone photo gallery and Pinterest boards

Whenever I wanted to buy merch from something I love, I was also discouraged and shamed. So sometimes when I see people display SO MUCH MERCH about something they are hyperfixated on makes me a little sad.

Like, it’s awesome that they love things and that they can enjoy their stuff, but I feel like I kinda missed out as a kid and teenager- I missed out enjoying my things just bc I liked them

I still feel embarrassed sometimes when I go on spirals about something I love and have been fixated upon, but I don’t wanna anymore. And that’s the purpose of this thread I guess?

If you’ve read all the way here and wanna know more about autism in women or adults in general hit my dms? Love you all bye