Okay, so I'm finally starting S7 of #OITNB. If you don't want to see my livetweet of the final season, this is your chance to mute tf outta this thread now.

Piper's a fckn Gemini ...why am I not surprised?

And I still really don't like her at all.

The fact that her brother went so fckn hippy-dippy still cracks me up, ngl...

Mmm... Why do I have a thing for Murphy?!

AND WHAT IS WITH THE INTERNAL MONOLOGUES THIS SEASON?!

My baby Suzanne!!!!

...Can I ship Gloria/Red? Is that a thing? It's not? Then fck you, it totes is now because I fckn say it is.

...Shit! I know it's coming, but I don't want to see this happening to my Red.

Though the fact that Mulgrew's doing it, given that this runs in her family...

...Can Murphy and Taystee have some good old hate!sex or...

Okay, Piper's dad is a douchewad though...

Daddy and Daya annoy the shit outta me...

Wait! Did Daddy really just... WTAF?!

Okay, moving on to ep 07x02 "Just Desserts"...

FIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGGG! Mommy, step on my neck please and thank you!

Also? Linda can fck off...

Aleida is a fckn idiot...

Suzanne and Doggett's friendship is actually fascinating tf outta me, ngl...

Man, the shit McCullough went through... I'm not surprised, but I hate it.

Yeah, McCullough better not get fckT up over htere...

Poor Suzanne...

Ward is the new warden?! FCK YASSSSSSSSSSSSS

Oh shit! Maritza got tagged by ICE?!

And of course, fckn Linda's picture is on the fckn wall!

Had to pause to make myself a salad and verify that I've seen Kiki [she's Mary on Batwoman now] and Daisy [she's Sophie on TLW: TNG] before. Glad I wasn't imagining that shit. LOL

Now on to ep 07x03 And Brown Is the New Orange

Ward shut down the Shu?! Holy shit!

God, but I love Fig and Caputo...

Hopper is such a douche!

...But I'm afraid he might not be wrong about why Ward was hired.

...DID LINDA JUST SERIOUSLY MAKE A FCKN MEAN GIRLS JOKE?! WHAT IS THIS BITXH'S FCKN PROBLEM?!

And if red is the "bad" ones, why are Blanca and Maritza in red?!

Poor Red... I don't like this SL. I'd like a refund.

I understand Suzanne trying to patch things up between Taystee and Cindy, but that ain't gonna happen...

Okay, I kinda got a thrill out of Taystee beating the snot outta Murphy...

Can I give Blanca a hug?!

I fckn love Fig. Her advice to Ward was *chef's kiss*

Is Murphy really gone?!

They're cooking at the ICE facility?! Dayum!

Okay, on to ep 07x04 How to Do Life... And this'll probably be my last one for the night.

Hold the fckn phone! You are not telling me that Lorna's baby... Nope, I can't even fckn say it. Are you fckn kidding me?!

Wait! Maritza's not... Holy shit!

Daya tryna be Daddy is some fckT up shit...

Is Taystee tryna... Holy fckn shit!

Okay, at least Daya's gonna make it harder for her to do it.

...I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm actually catching some fckn feels for Piper over the shit she's dealing with while trying to get a life back on the outside.

Fck, Taystee!

Yeah, I can't stop there. I'ma do one more. So here we go with ep 07x05 Minority Deport.

I never thought I'd say I missed Flaca and Maritza, but here we fckn are...

This fckn idiot is getting high? Is she trying to get back into Litchfield?

OMFG Piper high is legit me high on an indica strain when I've got the munchies.

Nicki's realizing what Gloria already started to figure out about Red, innit?

Maritza's gonna get herself screwed by giving out that code to too many people, isn't she?

Jesus, watching Red lose her shit is fckn painful...

Aleida's ass going back to Litchfield, innit? Dumbass... I mean, I get that she wants to make sure her girls are safe, but JFC..

What the actual fck?! Maritza's getting deported?!

Okay, pausing for now, cuz I can't afford another hour at this point, even though I want to watch another ep...

Okay, picking back up again with ep 07x06...

Okay, Fig's laugh when Joe tells her about his motility issues has me feeling some kinda way, ngl...

And then him doing her doggy style and coming too quickly like that? *cackles*

Linda is a fckn r*cist sc*mb*g...

I liked Maria in the beginning, then started feeling really ambivalent about her, and now I kinda DGAF about her anymore?

"You my life sister. At least until you pay me to d*e."

Why tf does this sound like me and Kakes? LOLOL #RideOrDieBitxhes

Fig teaching Ward "pivot and deflect" is fckn priceless! I fkcn love her!

Can I ship them or...

"Jesus, Joe, I am not kinking the way you're kinking."

I FCKN LOVE THESE TWO!

Is McCullough fckn hitting on Alex or...

And did she smell Alex's hair?!

Oh shit! Joe's kinda fckT now, innit?

I wish Cindy and Taystee had been able to make up somehow before Cindy got out, but...

Okay, moving on to ep 07x07 Me as Well...

LOLLY!!!

Okay, so I'm rolling my eyes at Lorna's anti-M*slim stance. That said, I am digging that Nicki's maybe finding love with the new girl?

...Susan wasn't talking about Caputo, was she? She was talking about Healey?

Poor Taystee and Suzanne...

Jesus, that dude running the ICE center is a douche!

And this whole thing with Doggett is upsetting af...

Watching Piper tryna fck other people is fckn hilarious and pathetic at the same time...

Oh, Joe... You stupid fckn idiot.

Doggett's got a learning disability, doesn't she?

OMFG Red!

I fckn LOVE that Ward is fighting for Taystee...

And now on to ep 07x08 Baker's Dozen...

Aleida's back. Not that I'm shocked. I have a feeling that's not going to end well...

This whole ep feels like a weird mindfck, ngl...

Taystee tutoring Doggett is legit awesome. I think it's going to help them both.

For someone who supposedly cared about Daddy, Daya's talking pretty fckn blase about her death...

Poor Red, poor Nicki... This is some fckT up shit...

WAIT A FCKN MINUTE! IS THIS CHICKEN THAT SUZANNE SEES RED'S MAGICAL CHICKEN?!

What a trippy episode this was...

And now on to my last ep of the night, 07x09 The Hidey Hole...

Man, I'm digging this friendship between Piper and Zelda, ngl... And I'm totes kinda shipping Alex and McCullough.

Red and Lorna childishly ignoring Nicki is both amusing and utterly pathetic...

There is something weird going on with Shani, no?

Okay, watching this scene between Vinny and Lorna is fckn painful! If he divorces her, on top of her losing the baby, she's absolutely going to lose her connection to reality.

What the hell was that flashback Lorna had?!

Wait! Was it a flashback or did she somehow escape?! This is so confusing...

...Did-- Did Lorna-- Was that the couple that just got engaged that she'd been talking to during the pool game? Holy fckn shit!

Okay, gonna pause until tomorrow night, as I'll need to head to bed in a bit here... Only 4 more eps. Will do those after work tomorrow.

Okay, picking up again with ep 07x10 The Thirteenth...

DID THEY SERIOUSLY FCKN TASER LORNA AND KlII THE FCKN MAGIC CHICKEN?!

Red cut herself?! Fck!

And what's with the chick and the parsley soup?

Jesus, fck Larry! Why are we dealing with him and Polly at all exactly?

Lady Cacciatore! LOL Love that name!

Fck Linda and her bullshit!

I am really getting into Alex and McCullough, ngl...

Okay, actually hearing Red's diagnosis and the reason behind its rapid progress/deterioration fckn hurt. But knowing that, even though she was pissed at Nicki, that's who she trusted to hear about the diagnosis with her was both heartening and painful, too.

Doggett fckn with Suzanne's plans re: the chickens is actually kinda funny and sweet in a sibling kind of way, ngl...

Okay, this scene with Caputo and his realization about Susan while doing the roleplay/reenactment in his class is fckn fascinating.

Oh god! Lorna's literally a shell of herself now. And Nicki feels responsible and like she let everyone down. Fck!

Alex is fckn getting jealous of Zelda and is gonna do something stupid, innit?

Oh shit... Alex is not a good person to piss off, Piper.

Okay, on to be 07x11 God Bless America...

I really want Linda to get her comeuppance, ngl, in a virulent and spectacular way.

Oh Jesus... Vinny telling Nicki the truth about Sterling and Lorna...

They're transferring her?! I mean, I'm not surprised. She needs the help, but fckn Nicki is losing everybody she loves. Fccccccck!

Wait! Karla's getting sent back? Without her kids? That's fckT up!

SOPHIA!!!! AND SHE USED "BECKY"!

I fckn hate that Karla got so fckT over, but I love that she's helping Blanca, ngl...

I hate that Nicki is so fckn torn up like this, but I'm so glad that she's trying to do right by her family.

OMFG I love Fig tryna help this woman who was r*ped.

And then having to watch the kids in that courtroom with Cl*tvack being a total douchewad. He needs his comeuppance, too.

I'm legit fckn tearing up watching Karla talk to her boys for probably the last fckn time. This is fckn bullshit.

Holy shit! I just fckn fell even more in love with Fig for what she just did for that ICE detainee. The character development she's gone through in 7 seasons has been fckn intense and phenomenal!

Shit! They found the phone?!

Oh shit! McCullough, wtf are you doing?!

I seriously fckn love Fig. Like I have no fckn words for how much I love her.

Nicki lost her chance to see Shani one last night because she was tryna help Lorna.

...one last TIME*

Okay, lemme check on my freezer defrost cycle and then we're moving on to ep 07x12 The Big House...

Holy fckn shit! I just saw the name that went by in the guest stars! I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THIS! SOMEONE NEEDED TO FCKN WARN ME ABOUT THIS SHIT!

"America was a virgin before the British entered." LMFAOOOOO

Oh, Tamika... That was not a smart thing to tell the COs.

Fig is having WAAAAAAY too much fun with teasing Caputo with all the things he can no longer say. LMFAOOOO I love these two fckers.

McCullough, you just fckn ruined any chances you had with Alex there, dumbass...

...Cindy's not gonna let that other patient d*e, is she?

Taystee, no...

Doggett's getting fckT over on the extra time for her GED? That's seriously fckT up! WTAF?!

Dayum, Maria, you just really moved me with that plea to Gloria. I'm impressed.

OMFG! Did Tamika set up Hopper?! Or did Daya somehow set up Aleida and Hopper both to stay Top Do-- err, Alpha?

NVM it WAS Daya. LMFAOOOOOOO

Suzanne and Lolly are

JFC... Poor Doggett. She doesn't deserve this shit.

...Another character I never expected to love in S1.

Red remembers Nicki! *bursts into tears*

This convo between Red and Nicki just killed me... Fck, that hurt.

I love Tamika, but girl is fckn clueless af sometimes.

Okay, Taystee saying all of her goodbyes is fckn tearing me up...

Oh Gloria...

I really fckn hate Daya...

Jesus fckn Christ, but I am giving ZERO shits about this fckn white bitxh Vauseman drama... I'm remembering again why I hated this shit from the fckn start.

Lorna's about to go postal. She's gonna klII that idiot, innit?

Wow! I no longer like McCullough for that stunt. Fck her!

Cindy on the street. I'm not sure why I'm surprised, but I am...

DOGGETT, NO! DON'T FCKN DO IT!

Tell me Taystee at least gets to say goodbye to Suzanne. Bitxh, she just walked into the room. Go talk to her, damn it! She is NOT gonna fckn understand!

POUSSEY! FCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCK! I have missed her.

Oh god, I hope this memory/flashback is something to stop Taystee from doing what she wants to do.

ARE YOU FCKN SHITTING ME?! DOGGETT WENT OUT LIKE THAT?! WHAT THE ACTUAL FCKN FCK IS WRONG WITH THIS SHOW?! I FCKN HATE THSI SHOW!

Against my better fckn judgment [and because I can't leave a show dangling with 1 ep left], I'm moving on to the fckn final ep 07x13 Here's Where We Get Off...

This intro/theme is different. I kinda dig it.

Okay, Doggett's ghost waving goodbye fckt me up, ngl... And then Suzanne's reaction in her bunk? Yeah, that's messed up, too. Oh okay, really? The egg on her pillow? And talking about breakfast for dinner? You really gone fck with my heart like that?

Fckn Luschek never fckn changed from day 1, did he? Dumbfuck!

Wait! Did Luschek just take the fall for Gloria?! OMFG! I take back my previous tweet.

Okay, this convo between Piper and her dad is fckn fascinating ...and actually hitting home on several levels for me.

Suzanne admitting she's growing up, even if it's hard, is so fckn beautiful. I love her development, too. She's always been my favorite from day one. There are so many characters whose development has been so fckn incredible over these 7 seasons.

Taystee saying goodbye to Suzanne hurt...

DOGGETT FCKN PASSED?! SHE GOT HER GED ANYWAY?! OMFGGGGGGGG!

Please tell me that fckn changes Taystee's mind! PLEAAAAAASE!

And JFC that song that Taryn sang is just hauntingly beautiful.

Thank FCK Taystee changed her mind!

I love that Taystee punched Daya!

The COs fckn with Linda re: the chickens was

OH SHIT! THE DRUGS! WHY DID LINDA FCKN HAVE TO FIND THEM?!

Poor Cindy...

Red and Lorna both in Florida is what's clearly best for them, but makes me sad.

I'm so glad Blanca's getting bonded out while they look into her case. And Chang coming in and bitxhing is both funny and sad at the same time.

OMFG! Suzanne's memorial for Doggett! Her singing Doggett's favorite song ...and Dixon joining in! And then everyone else joining in! I'M NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING!

Gloria's getting out. Fck... Guess these tears ain't gonna be stopping any time soon.

Wait! Is she not gonna get get to say goodbye to Red?!

So Daya, who bitxhed about how Aleida fckT up her kids, got her younger sister into hte "family biz"? What a dumbfck...

Wow! Larry's still a douche. Good to know.

Jesus, Nicki's even losing Alex. This is some serious bullshit.

"Anything can be a dildo if you're brave enough."

Cindy trying to make better with her mom and her daughter is beautiful.

Judy King... Wow! This whole convo between Taystee and Judy is fascinating! And wanting to do the microloans in Poussey's name is fckn beautiful.

Okay, I know Aleida just throat punched Daya, but did she actually...

Did Karla just get left in the desert to d*e?

Fig and Caputo adopting actually warms my heart like there are no fckn words...

"I never prepared them for life on the outside. Of course, they turned to drugs."

NEVER FCKN CHANGE, SUZANNE!

Okay, the fact that Nicki takes over the kitchen from both Red AND Gloria and runs it like a mama bear like both of them legit has me fckn in tears. And Flaca still tryna help all the ICE detainees like Gloria did? BAWLING NOW!

Okay, so I love that Gloria sent Maria the book for her daughter. That was so sweet!

BIG BOO! AND YOGA JONES! AND NORMA! AND ALL THE OTHER OGS WITH ALEX! THIS IS BEAUTIFUL!

BLANCA GOT HER GREEN CARD AND IS FREE!!!!

Okay, Red and Lorna is both sweet and sad af...

The Poussey Washington Fund!

...It feels weird that it's all over now.

So ends my thread for the S7 OITNB live watch. It took 3 nights and 186 tweets in this thread. And LOTS of laughing, swearing, and crying.