Hi. I'm gonna attempt to tell a story on here.

This story is titled: What Happened Backstage After I Won An Oscar

(I've told this story before, both in-person and on-podcast. Apologies if you've heard it before.)

So: I won an Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay in February 2019, along with my writing partner Charlie Wachtel, Kevin Willmott, and Spike Lee.

(Yes - that's insane, and it continues to be insane. The insanity of us winning isn't the point of this story, rather it haunts the story like some sort of spectral being... like let's say Casper, since it's a friendly-type haunting.)

Our presenters that night were Samuel L. Jackson and Brie Larson. I don't remember everything - just flashes of images, like walking toward the stage, and looking out toward the audience while Spike did his speech.

(An aside - in some photos of us on stage, I look a bit... intense. Or stern. I can assure you I was none of those things. I was simply straining to hear what Spike was saying, because the acoustics did not favor those of us on stage.)

(Also.. I was thrilled that Spike was the only one to speak b/c A) It was Spike's moment, and people wanted to hear from him and B) You know how it's terrifying to speak in front of millions of people? I was able to avoid that, and only had to stand there and not look stupid.)

Photo of me looking intense/stern but really just trying really hard to be a good stage partner to Spike and hear what he was saying:

Anyway.

Spike's speech ended, people applauded, and we walked off the stage - me, Charlie, Kevin, Spike, and Ron Stallworth (AKA the Real Black Klansman, who thankfully joined us as we accepted the award).

In addition to us, there were the aforementioned Samuel L. Jackson and Brie Larson. And as the telecast went to a commercial, Brie Larson started talking... to me.

Now, understand - at this point I've been a professional screenwriter for all of 18 months, and well, I still get star-struck.

And the thing is - Brie Larson is extremely excited for us. Genuinely thrilled. Like, as if she had won herself.

"This isn't going to make sense for a while. So just try to enjoy yourself." - Brie Larson to me, a grinning idiot who was probably nodding a lot. (I tend to over-nod in situations like this)

This, by the way, is good advice from Brie Larson.

So they take our picture a few times.

Here's one of them. (Hope it's cool it's watermarked, don't get mad at me Getty)

And then we were told us we should go back to the auditorium. They only allow people to go in and out of the auditorium during the commercial break. And apparently, this break was ending soon.

So if we wanted to get back in time for the next block, we'd have to hustle.

So all of us - me, Charlie, Ron, Kevin, Spike, Samuel L. Jackson, and Brie Larson dash down the serpentine hallway leading from the backstage area to the auditorium.

Spike and Kevin, a bit ahead of us, make it back just in time. But we are too slow. They close the door on us.

"Us" meaning me, Charlie, Ron, and Brie Larson.

So she turns to us, and this is what she says:

"You wanna do a tequila shot?"

Yes. Yes we do.

Here's the thing about the Oscars. There's a main bar area where a lot of people hang out during the show to grab drinks and talk and whatnot.

But there's another bar area. Much smaller. Backstage. It's where all the presenters hang out, before and after going out to present an award.

And you know who the Oscar presenters are - famous people.

THAT was the bar she took us to.

And that's how me, Charlie, and Ron Stallworth found ourselves taking a tequila shot with Captain Marvel, surrounded by Frances McDormand, Amy Adams, Michael B. Jordan, Guillermo Del Toro, James McAvoy, and Michael Keaton.

At one point in this bar, searching for something to say to the movie star who is standing next to me, I blurt out:

"By the way, I'm looking forward to Captain Marvel."

Her reply: "Don't worry about my movie. You just won an Oscar. Enjoy it."

More good advice from Brie Larson.

If you wanna hear me do more shameless name-dropping, I'm doing a fun screenwriting Q&A thing tomorrow (4/23) at 8pm for the @PackTheater on twitch

Here's a cool poster for it.

The event is pay what you can, donations go toward helping a Hollywood theater keep its doors open when this is all over.