Soooo one hundred and forty thousands of united states dollars is a lot of money to spend on tuition for all of secondary school, only for a child to come back with a result like that. I can see why dad is big mad. That's over 50 million naira & you're Absent for math & English?! https://twitter.com/Negumbo3/status/1252606180091887616
So should dad be mad?
ABSO effing LUTELY. I'm mad on dad's behalf too & I don't even know them
I don't pay tuition for my kids (I pay property taxes tho, which funds schools) so it's not free
(plus income tax, sales tax, black tax...I digress)
I'd be mad if my kid that did poorly
ABSO effing LUTELY. I'm mad on dad's behalf too & I don't even know them
I don't pay tuition for my kids (I pay property taxes tho, which funds schools) so it's not free
(plus income tax, sales tax, black tax...I digress)
I'd be mad if my kid that did poorly
I think the issue is what should dad have done with his anger. Should he have verbally and physically lashed out? I'm probably going to disappo you by not answering that because, to be honest, I can't 100% tell you that I can 100% predict my response to 100% of the time.
What I can tell you categorically though is that while reacting like that helps dad vent, it does nothing to address the real problem, which is why did this child do so poorly?? And what can we do to help change the trajectory of his life because beneath all that lashing out...
is dad's legitimate fear. My child is going to be a failure and there seems to be nothing I can do about it.
Please note that I'm speaking primarily as a clinician, not as a parent. The presenting problem is symptomatic of underlying issues, which if we don't unpack, will have us talking about "he should've done X, he shouldn't have done Y, if it's me I would've" That's a valid prism...
..just not the one I'm choosing to use cos all of that does nothing for us if our goal is to change the trajectory of this boy's life and set him on the path of success, which I imagine is this dad's goal. Parents, for the most part, want what's best for their kids. TBQHF
Side bar: if your goal as a parent is to show him pepper, I'm sure you know somebody who knows somebody who can arrange boys (or maybe even mopol or OPC) to teach him a thing or two. Boya he needs manual resetting or something of that nature...
But seriously, all of that does what? I mean, you don't have to look very far to see what the outcomes of using that approach does. In the mirror? Perhaps you were that kid & have a personal "testimony" of how your life changed after you were dealt with. Trauma actually, but
