ARE YOU AN ASKHOLE? DON'T BE! - A PSA

I just mentioned the term 'askhole' in another tweet and it got a lot of commentary/enjoyment. A couple years ago I wrote up this treatise about the various types of askholery. Maybe you'll enjoy it. (or have a brutal wakeup call) A THREAD:

Does your behavior fit any of the following Types of Askholery?

Type 1 Askholes will always ask for tips, advice, mentoring, etc. then do the opposite of it, or promptly ignore it, or repeatedly ask the same questions time after time without acting on the answer.

Type 2 Askholes have no initiative. They will always ask your advice about every possible thing, even when it's very readily searchable and learnable on their own - and they get offended or just downright ignore your suggestions / attempts to help them start

learning for themselves rather than solely mooching your knowledge.

Type 3 Askhole has zero self-awareness -- this type of Askhole will try to bluntly poach your connections and clients by straight up asking you for your client list or for inappropriate referrals.

Bonus Askhole points if you barely know this askhole (which is generally the case). This askhole will also get offended if you tell them that finding their own clients is part of the job, and will often get very self-pitying and claim that the business is 'too hard to break into'

Type 4 Askhole isn't mutually-exclusive (none of them are, really) -- you'll frequently find this type of askhole intermingling with the other types. This askhole doesn't interact with you socially or emotionally in any way outside of trying to repeatedly 'pick your brain.'

They will almost always use this exact phrasing. Type 4 Askhole will then take up WAY too much of your time asking you stuff, and will also never offer to compensate you for your expertise, even when their constant barrage of questions goes way beyond simple mentoring or advice.

CONCLUSION: DON'T BE AN ASKHOLE!

Note: This is not written to shame any specific person, and also should not be confused with earnest knowledge-seeking, genuine desire for improvement and critique, tactful questions, or respectful attempts to make new professional connections.

“Oooooo my fave askhole type:

Will go on your casting announcements and ask where you got the job without congratulating you. Will only DM to privately ask you what studio booked you which job.”

- @TianaCamachoVO regarding possible Type 5 sighting in the wild

@AlexJWeitzman has brought to light an important sub-variant - Askhole Type 1B:

“Another variant of askhole:

The one who will ask for your advice, and then criticize it right back to your face, because it's not exactly what they wanted to hear.”