Every deli/chipper in Arklow as a Premier League team a thread:

Ricos: Chelsea, always there or there abouts at the top of the chipper table.. but change managers every 2 or 3 years.

Burger Hill: Woves, they were irrelevant until a few years back, now they are a breath of fresh air in the chipper game. They suprise me every week, 10/10. @kilbridezac thinks Ricos is better, lynch him.

Proper Pizza: Everton, one week its mouth watering food the next week its food poisoning, do nothing but give out about them but you still crawl back to them the following week.. bastards.

Pettits: Sheffield United, people roll their eyes at the thought of a roll from Pettits. More fool them. Supirse me everytime with nice munch. Underrated.

Le Chef: Manchester City, absolutely class. The oil money is certainly flowing through Le Chef and it is turning into goujons, never be afraid to treat yourself to a roll, Sheikh Donal Molloy knows what hes at.

Apple Green: Spurs, everything can be going so well and then one day it doesn't rain in Apple it pours. Like Spurs in a acca, disaster,but will always return again.

Tesco: Arsenal, massive Supermarket Company, crap rolls, the lad with the mohawk behind the deli acts like its not his job to make you a roll when asked and he looks like he just drank piss through nettles, want to like them but find it so hard to do so.

Trade Winds: Manchester United, dominated the chipper game in town for decades but by christ on a bike what a fall from grace they've had. Clinging on to their Thursday Chicken Burger meal for dear life. Sad times.

Delightfully Delicious: Liverpool, dont want to say how nice and class it is cause you are a Le Chef fan but deep down it hurts how nice it is, bastards.

Charcoal Grill: Burnley, its just kind of there isnt it and it just wont go away.

Apache: Leicester, nobody has ever doubted Apache but the last year or so they've really upped the anti with the goods. Top of the range.

Eastern Promise: Newcastle United, have nothing against them but just dont like them. Every now and then they pop up with a suprise, have big ambitions every year but fail within 3 weeks.

Marsella's: West Ham, every now and then you want to change it up and decide to get Marsellas, after waiting 1 hour and 47 minutes for a delivery it arrives to only let you down again as per usual and it will never ever change.

Gala: Crystal Palace, thrown on the outskirts of the town and I wouldn't go out of my way to go there unless you're @kilbridezac, he claims the nicest breakfast roll in Arklow is made there,tell me lies tell me sweet little lies Zach. Can be decent at times though.

Rainbow Garden: Southampton, always been there kind of. Just hanging about. Completley forget they exist until one day you see someone tweet about something nice from there or one of the boys mention it in the chat but haven't got it in them to leap to the next level.

Wok Star: Norwich City, new on the scene and to be fair have some nice things to get, but unfortunately hasnt got it in them to play with the big boys. You can only think the end is near for Wok Star, sadly.

Arklow Chinese Takeaway: Bournemouth, the kings of inconsistency. Like Bournemouth on a Saturday, score 4 concede 7. To die for 1 week and binning it the next. Will still buy from there.

Burkes: Watford,sacking managers for fun. 1 week its Burkes the next Daybreak and the next Spar. Just as you think Burkes could make a break for the top you snap back to reality and they're back down around the dreaded deli relegation zone.

Asian Harvest: Aston Villa, can have there ups and downs. More good things than bad things to be fair. Can be proper lovely at times but then suddenly will have a fall from grace for a few weeks before picking up again.

Taurus: Brighton & Hove Albion, just hanging about for the craic. Why is it even there, so irrelevant. Nothing would ever pop into your mind to say "im gonna order Taurus tonight". Another one lingering above the relegation zone.

McDonalds: Fulham, every now and then you'll get the thought of a McDonalds and away you go. You haven't had it in ages but now you're hopping off it and all of a sudden its gone again, bit like Fulham, you dont see them for a few seasons till they get promoted to go down again.

Soya Bean:Huddersfield Town, get to fuck. There was a glimmer of hope for Soya Bean when you were drinking in The Gallery below it and you could go upstairs for munch, nah. They stayed 1 season too many and I never want to hear from them again, thrown up a lane above a pub,shite.

Centra: Cardiff City, every now and then ya might pop in and grab something and it might be nice but standard deli food. Not the worst but most certainly not the best and you wont see Centra again for ages, like Cardiff.Get promoted have the craic for 1 season and fuck off again.

End of thread.