Attempt at a provisional taxonomy of Zoom/Skype users:

Nostril Canyons; Big Stone Face; Infinite Forehead; Coming to You Live from the Center of a Tornado; the Settings Tweaker; the Power User; "Whither *Real* Human Contact [faints]"; the Background Mogul; the Pixelated Blob;
7-Second Delay; Mr. Privacy Concerns; “No, You Go Ahead”; POV Art Film; Home Office Docent; the Speaker View Advocate; the Blurred Background Booster; ACKNOWLEDGE MY PET; Was Just Crying; Was Just Eating; Toilet in the Distance; This Counts as Not Drinking Alone;
This Counts as Couples Counseling; Greetings from Another Time Zone; Weather Report; He Wanders Off; Pop Screen; Lavalier+Lapel ASMR; Mise en abyme; the Driver’s Seat; Gotta B. Quiet; Extremely in Bed; Also Baking; Disturbing Image Reflected in Glasses (a DIRG);
Two Laptops, Two Rooms; Couples Slapback Delay; Kissin’ on Camera; Emergency Podcast Retool; “In the Music Studio”; The Curse of the Reaching Hand; What the Holy Hell Is on That Shelf; Here at the Elementary School; Cynical Veteran of the Transition-to-Online Wars;
Headphones Mike; Traffic Reporter; Live from the Kennels; LOOMING OVER ALL; Mugshot; Oh, Just Doin’ Dishes; In the Garden; Dr. Bitcrush and His Audio Issues; Everyone Knows It’s Windy; Gonna Do Yoga; Just Went Jogging; Wethead; Whoops No Pants; Insisting This Is Normal
A Glimpse into the Inner Sanctum; "This Used to Be My Bedroom (Fantasy in Pink)" 12" remix; PBS Presents A Collection of Dubious Quality; The Books I've Read; Tons o' Vinyl; World's Messiest Walk-In Closets; I Heart Klimt
You can follow @TheGiantToad.
Tip: mention @twtextapp on a Twitter thread with the keyword “unroll” to get a link to it.

Latest Threads Unrolled: