Ahh yes. One time someone asked me why I dye my hair (insinuating mental illness) and I told them I don’t dye my hair but it grows purple bc I have “viopecia” and I did convince them that my hair grew purple. https://twitter.com/seahoodie/status/1252722235627929601

I could make a whole thread of these. One time a Karen asked me if I was cold bc I was wearing a crop top in 40° weather and I told her I lived in the research center in Antarctica my whole life so this was summer and she was very apologetic.

ANOTHER TIME someone didn’t believe that I was a sex worker so I convinced them that I wasn’t a sex worker but an assassin and I target wealthy people and his dad was on the list and he believed me??

Another time this chick mockingly asked me why I have such an intense gaze and I told her I could read minds so in order to tune out other people I have to focus on that one person. And she asked me what she was thinking and I guessed right and she was horrified.

OH ANOTHER TIME someone made an inappropriate joke about me being a massage therapist and I convinced him that he had a rare disease which was going to turn him into a turtle

ONE MORE okay so someone made a joke about my hair so I mashed Medusa and parsetletongue together and told him that now he’s going to now turn to stone and every time I saw him at the club I asked him if he was feeling more rigid and he wound up crying asking me to take it back