Read on Twitter
tw//panic attacks, anxiety, agoraphobia, mention of food & eating (if you feel uncomfortable reading about these then please don’t read this thread)
.
i cant remember when it started. my oldest memory is my 14th, i think, birthday where i was on holiday and we went out to eat +
.
i cant remember when it started. my oldest memory is my 14th, i think, birthday where i was on holiday and we went out to eat +
+ in this beautiful treehouse restaurant and i was so exited but when i got there, the whole experience was just the worse for me, i was very anxious walking in and ordering things and when the food came, i just couldn’t eat it and i was so embarrassed because i wanted +
+ to eat it but physically, i just couldn’t. i hated the whole experience and just wanted to leave the whole time. i was so embarrassed. and for the last 4 ish years (that i’ve noticed) everytime i go out anywhere, i feel uncomfortable and even if it’s something really exiting +
+ i just overthink and worry and i have a lot of panic attacks. there was one more recent case where i was at the cinema and the whole time i was there i was constantly panicked and i was trying to calm down and i ended up biting at my skin as a way to try and calm and soothe +
+ myself almost and now i have scars but i almost ran out of that room, i hated the experience and i cried when i got home. everytime i go out somewhere i always just have this discomfort and i panic and i’ve always been so embarrassed over it and had to say no to +
+ seeing my friends because of it. all i knew is it was some kind of anxiety thing, i talked to other people and they also thought so and so i just went along with that. and i’ve been trying to figure why i feel this way for the longest time but i cant figure it out +
+ i don’t have a reason for feeling like this, i just do. and for the last few months i’ve known about agoraphobia and only recently i’ve been able to recognise that maybe i have agoraphobia because the only place i feel comfortable is my house and if i could just +
+ stay at home all the time, i would. i don’t know enough about agoraphobia to say i have it but it’s the only thing i can really relate to. a lot doesn’t make sense to me and i’m always embarrassed, scared and just wishing i could walk out the front door without panicking +
+ and thinking of the worst possibilities. i wish i had someone to talk to who knew more about this than i do but i don’t so that’s just that but honestly if anyone else feels this way or is in a similar situation or just needs someone to talk to and feels like they don’t have +
+ anybody then know that there are a lot of people you can talk to and my dms are always open. this thread was so long i’m so sorry.. i just needed to vent and i have no other place to do it but here. so yeah. i’m sorry if i said things that make no sense or that where wrong +
+ i’m no expert but i just wanted to share my experience and what i’ve been struggling with on a daily basis for the last four ish years of my life. i’m still so confused and i have so many unanswered questions but i can’t do anything about it :/
