THREAD: About 3 and a half years ago, my dad died in prison. I can 100% say my ability to process this grief has been greatly hindered by the fact that he was alone behind bars and not with his family when he passed.

No one should die in prison and no family member should have to watch it happen. You feel entirely helpless especially when you are unable to be in contact with them. It’s so inhumane, harmful, and psychologically damaging.

I have been through lots of trauma in my life, but this is a grief so deep that even over three years later, I still shut down. Still have no idea where to even begin to process this trauma. And it still impacts my daily life, even with therapy.

It is made even harder b/c of flippant, heartless comments about people in prison from those in power & those close to me, the stigma of not only having but choosing to love & support an incarcerated family member, and the constant delegitimization of your & your loved ones pain

I’m hurting so much for people with loved ones inside COVID infested prisons. I know what it’s like having no idea what’s going on with your loved one,just knowing they’re in danger. The constant anxiety, lack of transparency from DOCCS, limited or no access to communication, etc

For a month before my dad passed, he was too sick to write or call. I was just waiting for the phone call to say he had passed. How excruciating.

When my aunt called a week before he died to try to get a sense of how he was & if we could schedule an emergency visit, DOCCS response was “he’s fine, we’re taking care of him, stop worrying” I can guarantee you the person on the phone didn’t even check on him or know who he was

It was the worst, most anxiety inducing month of my life that for sure contributes to mental health issues I struggle with every day. And it was entirely avoidable. I would still have trauma from the system no doubt. But if they had let him die w/family, trauma would be lessened.

I share all this b/c not one more family member or incarcerated person should experience this kind of pain. @NYGovCuomo I hope you read this and find it somewhere in your heart to see the human cost behind not granting clemency during a global pandemic, or ever. #CuomoLetThemGo