Here’s a story about the most random night I’ve ever had and it involved Katt Williams, Suge Knight and Chris Brown. It’s 2014. I had JUST discovered that I wanted to be a screenwriter. Wanted help and Katt came to mind. 1/33

He and my mom knew each other when I was a kid/teen. We slowly lost touch once the fame hit. I wanted to get in contact with him (because... why wouldn’t he want to help me lol). Y’all know the universe be listening and I got his number about two weeks later and texted it. 2/33

Katt replied asking who it was. He was being real suspicious. I low key panicked and said I was my mom. He asked for a picture. I sent one (of my mom). He was all HEY! How you been?! So I’m all phew! Glad that worked. But... now what? I had to think fast so it sounded legit 3/33

So I texted “you remember my daughter Britt right? Well she’s all grown up now and just started writing for film and I was wondering if you could give her some advice and connect her with other writers.” Katt said sure. I texted Great! I’ll pass your number along to Britt! 4/33

I waited 15 minutes because I didn’t want to seem too eager and sent him a text. He responded. He invited me to come to his home in Malibu. He also informed me that he could use a personal assistant and that if I needed income it pays around 50K so I got really excited. 5/33

I went to his home in Malibu, pulled up to this dope ass mansion with two huge dogs out front waiting for me. He comes to meet them sees that it’s me gives me a hug tells me I look like my mom and we go in. Caught up on old times referenced some things from back in the day. 6/33

I accepted the personal assistant position. The plan was to stick around until I had a masterpiece of a script and ask Katt to produce it.I know, I’m supposed to say he’s bat shit crazy but he wasn’t when I was around Katt was super nice to me and never tried anything. 7/33

He even told me that he respects me because he truly respects my mom. Respect goes a long way. Anyway he’s also hilarious but y’all know that already. My mom and sis and aunt Maura definitely gave me a talk because I was grown but they needed me to proceed with caution. 8/33

Ok so here’s the wild ass night. Katt said “find us something to do tonight.” I saw that Chris Brown was having an X album release party at One Oak in West Hollywood. Katt said that’s where we will go. So we get dressed and head out in his Black Escalade. 9/33

We get to one oak and park across the street. As we’re walking to the back entrance a retired NBA player yells out something to Katt. I couldn’t make it out. Katt stops, squints his eyes, and yells back “Do we got a problem?” They start cussing each other out. 10/33

Two grown men arguing isn’t something that I can or want to do shit about. Also... the height of the NBA player and the height of Katt is also something I can’t so shit about. It was so awkward. Luckily the NBA player never walked directly up on Katt... 11/33

Not sure what that was about but anyway we start walking again towards the entrance. We get to the entrance and the club bouncers are all What’s up Katt! Checks our ID’s then tells us to wait. A bouncer comes back and says we need to hold outside for a bit 12/33

Katt is not some regular why do we have to wait outside! Hella artists started walking up and I’m in la la Katt was hating talking about DO NOT BE A GROUPIE! Mad at me because I was swooning over Pleasure P and Lil Fizz. Katt clearly had no respect for my teenage years. 13/33

Celebs and socialites everywhere. Chris Brown finally pulls up in an orange Lamborghini and I was . I didn’t give a flying F about what Katt had to say about my drooling over Chris. More time passes and Guess who’s still standing outside. You guessed it... WE ARE. 14/33

Katt was getting impatient. We walked off. Things got weird AF. Katt asked me to look at the gathering crowd and tell him what I see. I’m looking but I see people trying to get in the club. That’s it. He was like no, Satan is here. I’m like yo WTF are you talking about? 15/33

The Game pulls up. I see him and his assistant and J Roc. I’m not sure what was going on with him either because I saw him walk to the front they sent him around to the back. A brawl breaks out where Game standing and Game is just standing there... untouched and unbothered. 16/33

The police rush over but didn’t arrest or touch anyone and asked Game if he could calm the situation. TF! I should have know what kind of night it was about to be. Next Katt asked me to look out for a white Rolls Royce Wraith. Googled it cause I didn’t know wtf a wraith was 17/33

Cool but why am I looking out for this car? He said because Suge is driving it on the way to the club and was about to pull up any second. I’m all why do you care if Suge pulls up?(and this is why researching potential employers, friend, or other relationship is important) 18/33

I don’t want to be seen with Suge Knight! I was 350 degrees hot! Katt was like chill out! While we’re arguing over Suge, J Roc walked up to Katt and was like I need to holla at you. If you’ve seen J Roc y’all know he’s not the type you want to hear let me holla at you from. 19/33

Katt said what can I help you with. J Roc says he needs his $200 from the security services he provided to Katt. I’m thinking it’s nothing to Katt because I have like 5K in my purse that Katt asked me to hold for the club I’ll just pull out $200 and we can be on our way. 20/33

Katt balled his face up and said you thought it was a good idea to walk up on me at a club asking for $200 MF dollars?! J Roc balled his fist up. He was not with the games. Next thing I know a white Rolls Royce Wraith pulls up and Suge gets out. 21/33

Katt sees that Suge is there and gets more confident. He starts backing up causing a scene like he was about to fire on J Roc but again... the height... so anyway Suge walks over to us and tells J Roc to chill and talk to him the next day. J Roc was like ok uncle Suge. 22/33

Now I’m rethinking all my decisions in life. I did not want to walk into a club with Suge! I start texting homies begging them to come get me from Hollywood and drive me to Malibu to get my car. My plan was to get back to Katt’s house, go in, grab my stuff, and hit the road 23/33

The only one who answered was my friend Fetle. She was already out tho without her car but really wanted to come get me. She said nothings going to happen but if you still feel like this by the time I get home in an hour I’ll come. Not too bad. I’ll go in for an hour. 24/33

Feels like I blacked out because everything happened so fast! We enter, Chris is singing on stage, shots fired, everyone is running and screaming, now I’m outside running with Katt we don’t know wtf is going on but we make it to the furthest corner away from One Oak. 25/33

Katt was like where’s Suge?! I don’t know I don’t care! I look at my phone and it dies right when I’m about to call Fetle Police swarm in from everywhere and girls were screaming crying and running. I’m trying to process what actually just happened. 26/33

We walked back towards the actions and we see Suge walk out holding his stomach. I see Blood. Police draw their guns at him and now I’m beyond confused. They tell him to sit at the curb guns still drawn. Turns out he was shot like 6 times. 27/33

He wasn’t even treated for the gun shot wounds right away he had to sit on the curb for a cool minute. I’m still very confused! We decided to bounce. Back in the car Katt tells me that I handled the entire situation like a real G. This is not the time for compliments Katt! 28/33

I’m irritated. On the way back to Malibu Katt stopped at a taco truck and asked me if I wanted anything. Did he think I had an appetite after being next to someone who just got shot 6 times! Now we’re back in Malibu and he took a back canyon that I’ve never been down before 29/33

We ended up far from his home but leveled with it kind of like we’re on a hill. He turned his high beams on so that he could see into his house (these rich no curtain having ppl) to make sure no one was there waiting for him. Jesus Christ! 30/33

I had my “God if you could just get me out of here alive” prayer going on in my head. It’s like 3:30am now. We finally get back to his house. I go in charge my phone and sit on the couch staring out into the darkness literally from 3:30am to 7:30am. A real G was scared! 31/33

Everyone I texted asking for help all of a sudden blowing my phone up sending me news articles about one oak and the shooting. Some were slowly responding over that next week. When I didn’t need them 32/33

My mom called the house phone and got into an argument with Katt over that night then called me and told me to get out. I did + never went back to Malibu. I don’t even have Katt’s contact anymore but I always pray for him. He’s like a cousin you love but can’t hang out with 33/33