I don't need a calendar to tell me it is Monday.

I fire up my work computer and the keyboard doesn't work.

I plug in another keyboard a my primary monitor goes blank.

I fix the monitor problem an attempt to reconfigure the keyboard.

...

The computer tells me the mouse is not compatible with the computer and that I need to install new mouse and keyboard software.

I download new keyboard and mouse software. The installer does not start. On the third attempt, the installer starts.

...

A path appears telling me that corporate system security policy does not permit running software from Logitech.

It tells me that I can enable running the software under system security settings.

...

When I attempt to change the settings, a form pops up demanding that I explain why I want to override the system settings.

I fill out the form but the options to enable running the mouse and keyboard software are still disabled.

...

It tells me I must reboot the computer for the changes to take effect.

The computer will not reboot.

It tells me my database client software is preventing the system from restarting.

I repeatedly attempt to kill the database client software but it will not stop.

...

After 15 minutes of trying, I am finally able to kill the database client software.

I get an attempt to restart.

Now my VPN client software is blocking a restart.

...

The computer finally restarts.

However, I cannot login because the mouse does not work.

I search for another mouse...

All my screens go black.

...

/me waits for someone to ask me to create a Jira ticket to account for my time spent getting my computer to work.